story

My new blog...

2008-01-30T22:10:00.000-05:00

Okay, I hope I still have some readers! My new blog is www.livinginthenow-jajbs.blogspot.com
I am in the process of trying to get a new layout, so bear with me... it is not very exciting right now. So... get on over there and see what is new with us, if you are interested!

Calling all pryer WARRIORS....

2008-01-05T22:47:00.000-05:00

This little cutie and her family need your prayers. Her name is Corynn and she just turned 1 yesterday (Friday). Her Mommy is Jodie and she lives in my town. We have gotten to be really good friends. She has 2 sons, one of which, is Jake's age. Corynn was released from PGN on the day Bella came to the U. S. (Oct. 30 ). She made it through PGN in 8 weeks with no KOs. The problem is Mixco. That is where her birth certificate is coming from. The Civil Registry there has decided that they "need" to review each case and approve it again. Well, after 10 weeks at the CR, she got a KO from them on Thurs. They said they needed more documents that are not usually required. They will review the case 30 days AFTER the attorney resubmits it with the new doc requirements.

Now, we all know this is illegal, but we all know that that does NOT matter in Guatemalan adoptions. Please PRAY for these people to have a change of heart. She should have been home and the family has missed Christmas with her, as well as her birthday. She got released from PGN HELL in enough time to make it home for both of these monumental occasions, but Mixco screwed them out of these months.

They really appreciate it! Let's pray Corynn home. If you are willing, please leave a comment for my friend, Jodie. She REALLY needs encouragement right now!

(I am still doing a new blog, but NEEDED to post this first.)

The Beginning, not the end

2008-01-01T00:03:00.001-05:00

Happy New Year! It has been an amazingly, wonderful, difficult and life-changing year for my family! We took a BIG step of faith in 2006 and blindly followed God's leading in 2007. We saw His promise to our family come true. Isabella is asleep in my bed right now and I am crying tears of joy and amazement at how far my Lord has brought me in a little over a year. Do I have farther to go? YES! But one thing I have learned is that it is okay to be human and doubt and scream and wonder if I heard correctly from Him. To fall and have HIM pick me up and I continue on is BIG for me. I have been stretched beyond what I thought was possible. I have grown in ways I never could have imagined and I have learned that to trust Him COMPLETELY is the BEST way to live!

It has been an amazing ride and I know it is just beginning. I thought we were just adding a precious baby girl to our family and that would be all, but He has, once again shown me that is not the case. Bella joining our family was just the spark He needed to ignite a passion in me. A passion that will begin the call He has placed on my family. Jeff and I both feel that we are on the brink of being launched into what He has destined for us. I have been a bundle of emotions since coming home with my daughter. It has taken me these past few months to realize that I need to pray through this and find its purpose. That is what we intend to do in 2008.

I have decided to close this blog and plan to turn it into a book for Bella. I am having Nikki design my new one. I pray that each of you will continue to follow our adventure... hang on, because I feel its gonna be exciting with some bumps along the way!!!!!

I am in the process of getting my pictures together for her, along with some other info. she needs. Please keep checking and I should have the new address posted soon! See ya on the other blog!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Love,
amanda

PICTURES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2007-12-31T02:40:00.000-05:00

Me and my Mommy!

This is one of my FAVORITE pics of my kiddos.... notice the look on Jake's face as he looks at her!

"We had a REALLY rough night.... you ought to see my Mommy's hair!!!! :)"

"Look at my bother's BIG muscles!"

Christmas pics to follow.....

Anyone still read this blog?

2007-12-30T23:06:00.000-05:00

I am not sure if anyone still reads this blog, but if you do... HEY!!!!!

I have not been a very good blogger since Bella came home. I know that so many of you were so good to me during our horrific process. I was encouraged and loved by so many and I don't want anyone to think I took that for granted and bailed once I got my precious baby girl home. It's just that, well, life with Bella and Jake has been WILD!!!-- in a good way! :)

She is walking... wrong... RUNNING everywhere. My mom and I laugh at her as we watch her roam around the house like a little old lady, seeing what she can knock down, pick up and throw or just get into. She is VERY inquisitive, much more than Jake was at her age. Jake is WIDE open, but I could leave him alone in a room and come back to find it just as it was when I left. NOT WITH ISABELLA!!!!! She will change it's appearance FAST!!!!

She is saying a few words.... Momma, Dada, Hello (with a palm-up, sideways wave), Bye Bye (with a backwards wave), and brover (brother). Let me tell you... she LOVES her brother!! He is the first face she looks for every morning and the first one to whom she gives her "loves"! It makes me so incredibly happy to see them chasing each other around my house and hear them laughing belly laughs! He ADORES her and strives to make her world PERFECT! In his eyes, Isabella can do NO wrong and he lets me know it. He calls her "Sweet Thing"!

She is attached to me!!!! If she could attach her body to me permanently, she would! Hey... I am not complaining. She loves her Daddy, but Mommy is her first choice... as it should be! :) She does not like to sleep, unless it is on me! I sometimes, feel like I am a human mattress.

I must admit, I was not expecting things to go as well as they have with her coming home at such a late age. I do get sad that I missed that very first birthday, but know that it was all in His perfect timing and He had a reason for it. I know that her coming into our family has changed my life FOREVER and has sparked something in me that I was not expecting. I will be posting more about that this week. I am not able to post pics... darn Blogger, but I will try to do so tomorrow and will promise to post more faithfully. I was considering going private or just quitting all together, but have decided to leave things as they are and continue on....

check back soon... if I still have readers, that is...

God is good!!!

2007-12-13T23:05:00.001-05:00

Well, I am happy to announce that Lucas was declared ADANDONED today and Jane can now start his adoption!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thank you for your prayers and support! It will be a Merry Christmas for my friend Jane!!!!!!

They are here!!!! and a prayer request for Lucas

2007-12-11T17:46:00.000-05:00

The little boy in the picture is Lucas. He is my friend Jane's son that she has been trying to bring home for 2 years now. The little girl is Karly and she came home in October. Jane has a big ole Momma's heart and she has given a home to 4 Guatemalan girls and is in process with a precious little boy that enters PGN this week. Here is the problem with Lucas. He needs a COA issued by Friday before the judge goes on vacation until the first of the year. They told our attorney that they would not issue a court date to give the COA until August of 2008. In lieu of the Ortega Law passing today, August is too late and Lucas will not come home. Now, this case has gone through the Appeals Court and they ruled in favor of an abandonment decree being issued. The problem is the judge... he is not cooperating and wants to make things difficult.

Lucas has watched 3 other children make it home to Jane before him and she started trying to bring him home before any of these. This is heartbreaking. I had the privilege of spending a week with him and Jane in July and he stole my heart. He carries around a photo album of his family here and his house and his room. He just sat and looked at those pictures for hours in July. He also has a shunt in his head and it will need to be changed out next year, as well as needing a hernia surgery.

I tell you all of this because he needs a MIRACLE!!! I know times in Guatemala are not good right now for adoptions and all families need a miracle. But... please storm Heaven's gates for this little boy and his Mommy, Jane. She is torn up and just a mess. Imagine having to go tell him that he will never come home to the only Mommy he has ever known. He was brought to the hogar at only a few days old wrapped up because of his hydrocephalus and no one wanted him. Jane and her family wants him SO badly and he NEEDS them.

Please pray that the judge has a change of heart and give him the COA in the next 3 days before he leaves for vacation!!! I will keep you posted.

AND.......

Our Christmas cards just came in. If you have not already sent me your address and want one, please e-mail it to me. asalemi@cox.net

I will be sending them out this weekend!

Please pray...

2007-12-08T01:00:00.000-05:00

for these precious baby girls and their families.

This is Eloisa and her parents are Drew and Bekah. They really need to hear that she is OUT of PGN. It has been a long and hard journey and it is overdue. I am committing my weekend to praying for them. Bekah is such a mighty woman of God, with such a sweet spirit and precious heart. I am amazed by her strength and wisdom and faith in the Lord. Please join with me and pray specifically for her file to be signed out of PGN this week.

This is Corynn. Her Mommy is Jodie and she lives in my town. We have become really good friends. She got released from PGN on Oct. 30- the day Bella came home! She still does not have a Birth Certificate because it is coming from Mixco and the officials there have decided not to release any until they "approve" the cases. Now, mind you she made it through PGN in 8 weeks without a kick out and Barrios approved it with NO problem. It is not the Civil Registry's job to approve cases, but in Guatemala they do what they want to do, regardless of the law and others suffer for it. It will be 6 weeks this Tuesday since her approval and she is no closer to being home. She will be 1 year old on Jan. 4 and if that BC is not given, she will miss Christmas with her family (2 big brothers that are anxiously awaiting her arrival!) and her first birthday... all over some person that is doing something totally illegal and nothing is being done about it! Please pray specifically for her BC to be released this week. Enough is enough. You can imagine how her parents are hurting.

I know there are so many people waiting for their children to come home. I am praying for you daily. My heart breaks for the condition of Guatemalan adoptions right now. Please know that you are not forgotten and that my family prays for all of you each night. As I check the blogs that I read each day, I pray for each of you before going on to another blog. I am believing that the officials in Guatemala will do the right thing and that their hearts will be turned toward the children and not political agendas. If you are a reader of my blog and would like for another family to lift your adoption up in prayer, please leave me a comment and I promise you it will be done daily until your children are home.

LSU Christmas

2007-12-05T01:06:00.000-05:00

LSU Christmas

Twenty four days before Christmas, in a state in the south,
Les Miles was ticked as he opened his mouth.
“Miles to Michigan,” was reported as fact.
To which Miles responded, “Herbie you don’t know jack!”

The Tigers had suffered a gut wrenching loss,
At the hands of McFadden and the rest of the hogs.
And Bo in his sweatshirt, and Miles in his Hat.
Were determined to prove they were better than that!

When the Tennessee Vols ran out on the field,
There were ruckus applause from the mentally ill.
Still in the locker room, Les told his team,
“This season ain’t over. We still have a dream.”

The hurt throwing arm of QB Matt Flynn
Meant Ryan was the man they put their faith in.
Then the fans all heard, what Les said in the Dome.
“I ain’t goin’ anywhere. I’m happy. I’m Home!”

The fans were still thinking “This might be a trick.”
‘til someone pointed out “Hey, this guy ain’t Nick!”
The Hat took the field for this championship game,
And he brought all his Tigers, and called them by name;

“Now, Hester! Now, Early! Now, Highsmith and Putt!
Let’s let ‘er rip and shut these guys up!
Take to the field! And give it your all!
Then later we’ll watch numbers 1 & 2 fall.”

The fans still weren’t sure as to what team would show,
The Virginia Tech game seemed like so long ago.
But there in the stands, the fans they did cheer,
As Perrilloux played his game of the year.

While out in Ar-Kansas, the hogs claimed the boot,
The tigers were focused on far better loot.
With the game knotted up, Ainge threw a quick out
But Zenon was ready and took six to the house.

He wore an LSU jacket, and a white turtle neck,
The same as he wore when his team beat La Tech.
With the hat on his head, and a childish grin,
Miles put his team in the title picture again.

His smile-how it widened! as Pitt won its game!
He cheered Oklahoma, when it did the same.
The stars were aligning, it couldn’t be true.
Turns out Miles WAS destined, to play O-S-U.

With a month to prepare and a month to heal up,
We’re all pretty sure which team will show up.
He ain’t going to Michigan, and we’re sure of that.
But Tressel and the Buckeyes should still Fear the Hat.

On December first, he called L-S-U home.
Then set up the Tigers, to play again in the Dome.
It soon will be legend, how Les started that day,
“Can’t talk now. . . . I’m busy. . . . [Y’all] have a GREAT day!”

Continuing Traditions...

2007-12-03T22:36:00.001-05:00

For as long as I can remember, my parents would give me and my sister a Christmas ornament on my birthday. It was always an exciting time... more than my actual present... to see what ornament they would give us. Sometimes it would be something to remind us of something important from the year or just something unique. They always picked PERFECT ones! Then when I got married and left home, I had ornaments to decorate my own tree.

I have been doing it for Jake and was SO excited that Bella was home to share in our family tradition! This year, I found the PERFECT one! It is from the Hallmark Keepsake Collection. It is called "Forever Family." I tired to put it down here, but Blogger was not cooperating... um, imagine that?! :) It says: " 2007 Connected with a bond of belonging-- forever family."

It is our family ornament this year. So... do you think I did a good job carrying on my parents' tradition?

I spent the day shopping with my baby girl. We bought her some new Robeez and she was quite proud of them. She showed them to everyone that would look and clapped as they oohed and aahed over them. My daddy bought us steaks and Jeff grilled them. It was a GREAT birthday and I will never forget it. BELLA IS HOME!!!!! BEST PRESENT EVER!!!!!!!!

Sorry, no pictures of the night, we forgot. Santa came by on the fire truck through our neighborhood and through the kids candy. I remember thinking last year that Bella would be here for it this year and she was. It was the best!

Here they are....

2007-12-03T00:15:00.000-05:00

First things first...

"Have you heard? LSU is going to play Ohio State for the National Championship!!! How 'bout them Tigers?!

Now... Bella update... she is walking- NO more crawling. She just cruises around the house seeing what kind of mess she kind make! In one month, she has begun walking, got her first haircut, gone to the park, done LOTS of shopping and eating out, starting saying some English words, helped Daddy and Jake put Christmas lights on the tree, started eating some table food, gained over 1 pound, and learned to drink out of a straw! She has been busy!!!!!

I get so overwhelmed and emotional each time I hold her and look at her. During our adoption, I did not give much thought to her birth mom, but while we were on pickup, I was able to read her social worker report and learn more of her situation. Something changed in me at that moment and I began to truly realize how much love this woman had for this precious baby girl. I mean, as a mom to Jake, I cannot imagine how I would live day to day not knowing who had my baby, where they lived, what kind of life he was living and yet, Bella's birthmom does this daily. I hope to be able to instill a love for her in Bella. She truly gave the ultimate sacrifice of a mother's love to my daughter and for that I will forever be grateful. Not a day goes by that I don't think about her and pray for her.

We are going to be getting Christmas pictures done this week for our Christmas cards. I did not do cards last year since my other child was not home. It just did not feel right. I found the cutest dress for the occasion and cannot wait for everyone to see them. If you want one, please e-mail me your address. My e-mail address is asalemi@cox.net

Now on to more pics of my precious children (I love the sound of that... "children"!)

Holding Daddy's hand while she sleeps!

My sleeping beauty.

My sleeping beauties! Notice her hand on her big brother's arm. She sleeps like that with him.

First haircut... not too sure.

Trying to get Daddy to save her.

This is the kind of mess she "finds" when she cruises the house. This child LOVES to unroll toilet paper. I got smart, after this one, and removed it and put it where she could not reach it! We found some in her mouth!

This is her newest thing... when she sees a camera, she gives this cheesy grin as her pose. We got to work on that or there will be no modeling career in her future! LOL

Playing with Daddy. She just started sticking her tongue out ALL of the time.

She loves to jump on Daddy's belly and hear him moan.

I admit, I have been really lazy with taking pictures. I will be more diligent this week and get some better shots. Today is my 35th birthday and I am so excited she is here to celebrate. Jeff took me out to the Melting Pot Friday night. We left both kids with my parents. It was the first time I left her with anyone except Jeff and I only did that the day after Thanksgiving for Christmas shopping. She did great! I had a harder time, though! LOL :) Anyway, normally, I would not be happy about turning 35 (30 hit me REALLY hard), but having Bella home has brought me a contentment that I have not had for a while. Jeff is cooking steaks and my dad is coming over to eat. I will post pics of the very special occasion.

Hope everyone has a GREAT Monday!

WOW!

2007-11-28T08:59:00.000-05:00

Wow! I just realized that Bella has been with us for 1 month and on Saturday, it will be her 1 month anniversary HOME!!! I haven't blogged alot lately, due to the fact that she is keeping us quite busy!

Bella is doing great! She is now walking--- no more crawling! She is saying a few words... very important ones... like, Momma, Dada, Broer (Brother)... you know the ones that matter! LOL She doesn't like to sleep, she LOVES her bottle, is VERY affectionate, smiles OFTEN, not very fussy, oozes personality, blows kisses, waves to EVERYONE she sees... she is quite the little flirt! I have lots of things I want to blog about, but finding the time has been a challenge. I hope to be able to share some of them soon. I know it has been a while and I hope I still have some readers out there!

I still have bronchitis and now a severe sinus infection. I promise to post pics this weekend!

Until later...

Busy Bella

2007-11-13T23:33:00.001-05:00

My Beautiful, Brown-eyed Girl! She is one BUSY girl... always on the move looking for something new to "explore". The other night, I found her popping out all of my safety plugs from the wall sockets!

Helping Momma load the dishwasher.

This is where she spent her time this morning while I was getting ready.

She automatically smiles when she sees a camera now.

Jeff and I had to go to the doctor last week (where we found out we had bronchitis!). This is what Bella did while we waited to see the doctor. We spent 3 hours in there and she never once fussed-- just explored CONSTANTLY!!!

"Hey, Daddy, how do you get that echo sound in your voice?"
She is a cabinet closing and opening little booger!

"Hey, Daddy, let me drive... oops, I almost ran off the road because I got sidetracked... I looked up and saw a sunroof!"

"Daddy, you are the BEST!!!"

Do you think she has him wrapped, yet?

Two days later, we were at the ENT with both kids (that still sounds weird!). We found out that they BOTH had bronchitis and Bella had a touch of croup, too. I cannot tell you how good it was to see my TWO children playing together in the doctor's office. I actually got teary-eyed watching my heart's desire right there!

Pray for my friends and their precious children...

2007-11-12T21:28:00.000-05:00

I would like to ask all of my readers to pray HARD for some of my friends tonight. First of all, let me say, that I am NOT computer savvy and do not know how to copy pics off of other blogs and put them on mine. The times it was done for previous posts, my husband did it and he is not here tonight. So, with that being said, I will just list their names and what they need you to be in prayer about.

Jerry and Stacie-- They are currently waiting on PINK. Their daughter's name is Allie and this is their first child. They should have gotten an appointment last Thurs., but things did not happen like they should. Please pray for roadblocks to be removed and them to have favor with the embassy tomorrow!

Drew, Bekah and Benjamin-- They are waiting for sweet Isa to join their family FOREVER. She just turned a year old in Guatemala and I know the pain they felt that day. There has been problems with the attorney the agency assigned to their case and they need things to be resolved QUICKLY and the truth to be told about the status of their case. Please pray for the hand of God to guide their file through to the end and Isa into their arms forever!

Melissa and Jodie-- There are problems with the Civil Registry where they need a birth certificate issued. Please pray for these obstacles to stop and the bcs to be released. These precious girls need to be home for Christmas!

Chris and Lindsey-- This couple has endured more than their share of heartache. As they begin a new adoption, please lift this precious couple up before the Lord. Pray for things to happen quickly and for the hand of God to guide those involved in finishing this adoption. They just returned from meeting her and I know they pain they are feeling without her. Lift them up to him.

Bama Girl-- I don't know this woman, but my heart is burdened for her and her family. Precious Sydney is caught in a political web and suffering at the hands of evil people in authority. Pray for the necessary hearts of those involved to be soften and turned. Sydney needs to be home and this family needs to experience joy instead of heartache.

Ashley and Madeline-- This friend of mine has without a doubt endured more pain than any other person involved in adoption. She needs a miracle to bring precious Madeline home. I serve a God that does miracles and we need to pray He moves in this case in a MIGHTY way! Pray for her broken heart and for strength to continue to endure.

Jennifer and Sara Michele-- Sara is in the same orphanage that Bella lived in and she got caught up in a political web, as well. Please pray for the appeals court to release her certified copies so that this little girl can join her forever family!

Jane and Lucas-- Pray that an abandonment hearing is scheduled SOON so that the COA can be issued and his adoption can finally begin (after over a year!).

I don't know if I am forgetting anyone. If I am, please forgive me and e-mail me. I would LOVE to put your request out for others to surround in prayer!

A little glimpse...

2007-11-08T23:33:00.001-05:00

Throughout our whole adoption process, I will admit, my faith waivered... I had my doubts and my rages... sometimes at God. I am not proud of it, but I will be honest. Two days before the civil registry released our birth certificate, I told God that I wanted to finish this off with my head held high, being able to praise Him... not hang it low, despite my unbelief, when He did it. I asked Him not to let that BC be released until I had whole heartedly found peace and dropped the unforgiveness I was holding. You may ask who I could have had unforgiveness towards. Well, for one, my attorney. I felt that she used our case to further her ADA work and we got tangled up in a political fight between her and the powers that be in Guatemala. I blamed her.

Then, I began to read a book called The Bait of Satan-- The Sin of Offense. I started reading this book on that Tuesday that I prayed the above prayer to the Lord. In it John Bevere, the author, sets the stage by telling you that if you are a child of God, NO man or NO thing can thwart the plans He has for your life. Yes, people have a free will, but He can stop anything He does not want happening in your life. He told how Joseph was sold into slavery and thrown into prison unjustly. Now, we went through a lot, but NOTHING compared to this. And, yet, he was able to realize that it was all part of God's divine plan for his life. It was at that moment that I realized that our adoption did not go the way we had anticipated it... it went the way He charted it.

He called us to adopt... of that I am MOST certain. He KNEW the day she would join our family and the age she would be when it happened. He NEVER promised me that she would come home as an infant. He just asked us to be obedient and our job was to do that and trust Him to fulfill the dream He had birthed in our hearts. MY plans were to bring home a little baby and move on with my life. HE HAD OTHER PLANS!!!! Yes, Susana, used our case to further a cause in Guatemalan adoptions and as far as I can see, it did NOT pave the way for anything positive. However, Bella came home at the perfect age and at the perfect time-- HIS TIME.

Today marks 2 weeks exactly since she joined our family FOREVER. I was listening to John Bevere's series A Heart Ablaze on my way to bring Jake to school this morning. He was talking about Moses bringing the children of Israel out of Egypt. He asked the congregation this question:"Why did God lead the children of Israel out of Egypt?" The people responded, "to bring them into the Promise Land." NOT TRUE! He led them out of Egypt to bring them out of bondage into freedom. In this past year, He brought me out of the bondage of dependence on myself and into the freedom of trusting Him with EVERY area of my life! The glory of the Lord was revealed to them IN the desert, as they wandered around. The desert is not a place of being forsaken by God or left alone until He decides you have spent enough time there. It is a place where you are not living in the abundance of life. You are only given the day's manna.. the provisions you NEED for THAT day. WOW!!!! That spoke to me. He went on to say that "it is in the desert that God quiets you heart and changes you for HIS glory". You see, if you had the abundance of everything working out in your life the way YOU planned, then you would not need to depend on Him.

That is where the glimpse I spoke of in my post title comes in to play... I know now that He allowed our desert time to happen so that He could quiet me and teach me TOTAL dependence on Him, despite the situations others placed us in. I can tell you that I changed in the last 16 months. Was it an easy change? NO, but as I wrestled with MY will and against HIS and as I kicked and screamed, He broke me and taught me that my life is in HIS hands... a place where I willingly placed it when I was 13 years old. And about that birth certificate... it was released 2 days later! :)

Things are going great with Bella and her attachment to us. She said "Momma" the other night when she woke up... needless to say when I heard that over the monitor, I nearly broke my neck getting to her! :) I can say that times are tough with me not working and getting paid and look bleak to our human eyes, but I have learned to look at my life through the eyes of faith. If I keep my eyes on Him, everything will be provided and I will fulfill my purpose.

I pray that if you are still waiting for your precious little one, that you surrender your will for His and that He wraps you in His arms every step of the way until He delivers your "promise" to you and your family. I am praying for all of my blogging friends still waiting... your time IS coming!!

First trip to the park and other misc. pics

2007-11-05T00:24:00.000-05:00

Today was a beautiful day and we decided to take Jake and Bella to the park to enjoy it. This was the first time Ms. Bella was put in the grass. She wasn't too crazy about it at first, but when I sat down with her, she realized it must be okay and she began to attempt to eat it. Well, when she saw my reaction, she tried even harder. She is quite the clown and LOVES to make us laugh!

Enjoy the pics... some of them are from today, some are from my nephew's birthday party yesterday and some are just of Jeff and Bella enjoying an early morning snack. I was told tonight (by Steph) that I was not blogging enough with pictures... so here is what you wanted Steph!

Happy Birthday, Joel!! Nana loves you!!!

My daddy feeding Bella some icing... she LOVED it!

You may be wondering where the hairbows and pigtails went... well, she has decided that she doesNOT want them in her hair. She feels up there throughout the day to be sure I have not sneaked one in on her. She will pull at it until it is beyond fixable.... hoping this phase will pass!!

This girl LOVES her some bananas!!!!

"LSU, LSU, LSU!!!! GEAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUX TIGERS!!!"

2007-11-04T11:46:00.001-05:00

Well, Bella experienced her first LSU football game last night. I was quite worried about how it would effect her. I mean, you can only imagine the whooping and hollering going on with all of my uncles, cousins and my husband watching the Tigers go up against Saban's new team for the first time since he left us. There was so much hollering going on, but it never phased her... infact, she began hollering at the t.v. and when Jeff threw his hat after the last flag they called on LSU, Bella followed his lead and began throwing her toys! Great example her daddy is, isn't he?

Lou, I saw your post and am SO sorry you had to resort to dressing AP in victory attire. She did look ADORABLE in it, though! :)

"Sorry, AP and Allie... want me to see if my Mommy can send you a dress like mine? The colors would like GREAT on both of you! Hurry up and get home, Corryn... LSU needs you to cheer them on to the championship!!!"

But I must say, it was quite the nail biter... LSU loves to give us those these days. But, Bama, did play one heck of a game!

First morning at home

2007-11-02T22:45:00.000-05:00

She woke up her brother really early.

First time seeing her room!

"WOW! I LOVE it!"

Somebody taught her how to "love the baby". This is what she did when I told her to love her baby. She is a genius!

Giving Jake kisses.

My 2 angels!

As you can see, she is adjusting quite well. It truly is as though she has been here forever! God has been so faithful. She has become quite the "Daddy's girl", also. She is on the verge of walking. She says "hola" and "da da". I am working on "Momma" and hope to have that accomplished next week while Jake and Jeff are gone! :)

We went to my school today. They had a pep rally and little Miss was clapping and cheering with the best of them. She, of course, charmed everyone she came in contact with. She had her first doctor's appointment this morning. She weighs 20 lbs. 13 oz. and is 31 inches long. She got a flu shot and was quite the trooper. Jake got one also and in keeping with our family tradition, both angels got a toy at Toys R Us for enduring the shots! We are off to my nephew's 2nd birthday party tomorrow. I will have lots of pics to post.

Tomorrow LSU will beat Bama and Bella has a new dress to celebrate the occasion... stay tuned....

Homecoming and Halloween

2007-11-01T15:13:00.000-05:00

Jake waiting for his baby sister to arrive.

Jake and Bryson getting ready to welcome Bella to the U.S.

Jake was the first person to welcome Bella home. (Thanks, Kim, for capturing this moment so perfectly!)

Bella could not take her eyes off of Jake.

Bella meeting McKenna for the first time. Our friends, Keith and Roxanne adopted McKenna a few years ago and it was at their house back in April of last year, that we decided to take the step of faith on the road to our daughter! Thanks, guys, for coming to the airport to welcome Bella home. It mean so much to us.

Bella with her Daddy!

This was the first time that Bella and her cousin, Joel, got face to face. Joel has waited anxiously for her to arrive. He used to put her picture album next to him on the sofa with it opened up to her pictures and let her "watch" t.v. with him!

Bella with her Poppa (my daddy) for the first time!

Bella with her Bubbles (my mom) for the first time.

Bella and Mommy!

Everyone (about 50- 60 people) met us at the airport. They were all awaiting our arrival at the top of the escalator. We let everyone else off the plane before us. Bella was quite the celebrity on that flight. She waved and told everyone "Hola!" as the exited. My sister, Laurie, said that people were passing through our crowd telling them that they had already met Miss Bella! The stewardess said she did not know we were carrying a celebrity on the plane! LOL As we came through the gate, the flashed started going off, people started yelling "I see her!" and the crying started for some. I was doing fine until I saw Jodie (Corryn's mom) holding a sign that said "welcome home, Bella, and ...". She then turned the sign around to reveal that "Corryn is OUT!!!" that's right, on the day Bella came to the U.S., Corryn got released from PGN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! That set my tears aflowing!!! Bella went from person to person until 10:00 that night. She collapsed in her crib and slept until 8:30 the next morning. I will post pics tomorrow (or tonight) of the storks my parents and my friend, Ashley, had delivered in my yard. I will also post more about other nice things we got from friends and family. I hope these pics will tide you all over until Miss Bella goes to sleep.

Our descent down the escalator. The security guard told us we had to move the party downstairs

We took the kids to a Fall Festival. Bella was a ladybug and Jake was Wolverine, from the XMen. I want to send a BIG thanks to Ashley and Addi for finding these costumes last minute for me. We left in such a hurry for Guatemala on such short notice, that I did not have costumes. We were not anticipating Bella being home for Halloween. (You were right, Steph!!!!!)

Jake, as Wolverine!

Bella has wings

Mom of 2!

Sorry it took so long to get these posted. Life with 2 kids and a husband is quite different! LOL I will post more home pics and updates on our adjustment. It is going GREAT!!!!

Guess what we're bringing home from Guatemala?

2007-10-29T18:21:00.001-05:00

Isabella Claire is packing it up and headed to the U.S. tomorrow. She will land in Houston tomorrow afternoon and then onto her home state of Louisiana!!!!!!! See y'all then....

VICTORY!!!!!

2007-10-28T20:34:00.000-05:00

Bella LOVES to play Pee Pie!

Playing Pee Pie with Daddy!

Playing drums on the table with Daddy!

"I let my Daddy pick me up!"

"I got ya, Daddy!"

"Daddy's gonna get you, Bella!
"Daddy got ya, Bella!"

"You can't get me, Daddy!"

"Uh Oh, Daddy, you got me (and I LOVE it)!"

"It really is FUN to play with my Daddy!"

Well, as you can see, we had major VICTORY today! Thanks for all the prayers! She let Jeff feed her today and she willingly gave him kisses (even solicited them!), and reached out to him for him to hold her before I put her to bed! She is on her way to becoming Daddy's little girl! :)

More Cuteness...

2007-10-27T22:20:00.001-04:00

Her favorite toy is a plastic feeding spoon! That will make Christmas easy!! LOL :) (I was talking to Jeff through clenced teeth in this picture... she was pulling my hair in the back with her other hand. She is a major hair puller.) She took 2 steps by herself from the end table to the coffee table. I have not doubt she will be walking within the month! That is, if I can find it in me to actually put her down.

She found the tissue in the diaper bag and had her own party!!

She was having a good ole time.... until she began eating it and I took it away. The next picture shows what she thinks of me doing that and redirecting her.

"Hey, I was having FUN over there!"

Just plain ole sweetness!!!!

The beginning of our day.

2007-10-27T10:32:00.000-04:00

This is what happens when she realizes Jeff is in the room!

This is what happens when Jeff doesn't disappear!

She did GREAT last night! She slept (in her crib) from 8:00 until 3:30. She woke up for a bottle and diaper change and went back to sleep until 7:15! As soon as her eyes opened, she was all smiles, ready for her breakfast.... until... she realized Jeff was laying next to her in the bed while she ate. It was downhill after that. Continue to pray!!!!

We are off to eat breakfast and then do a little shopping. I will take more pictures today and post later. Have a great Saturday!

Embassy Day!

2007-10-26T23:05:00.000-04:00

We had our embassy appointment this morning. We were there for 3 hours and she was a dream baby! The only time she fussed was if Jeff looked at her, tried to talk to her, or got in her personal space. Which by the way, her idea of her personal space is MUCH larger than the average persons! :) Jeff had to sleep on the couch because I put her in the bed with us and every time she would roll over and see him, she would start to scream. I felt bad, but I needed to sleep no matter the cost to him! LOL The night before we left, I only got 1 1/2 hours of sleep. It was a very spontaneous trip! I KNOW we had the favor of God in this step! Tonight I got a crib and she is sleeping like an angel in it and Jeff will get to sleep in the bed! :) He is very excited!!!

I can honestly say that as I walked away from the last window, I felt like my old self instantly! It was as though I left the weight of this adoption at that window. I know many people have said that it was non-eventful and unemotional for them, but for me it was very emotional. I did not cry, but my eyes teared up and my heart was light. "Thank you Father for bringing us through this and to the promise you had for our family. Thank you for giving us strength during those difficult times and for carrying us when we were too weak to walk the path you set us on. Thank you for our little miracle. She is perfection!"

Now, attachment... she is doing great with me. She has excellent eye contact, smiles at me often, is very playful and LOVES to give me kisses!!! She is a good eater, too. All along I have suspected that she may have a milk-protein intolerance. However, because she was in the hogar, I was unable to have her formula changed. I took the advice of my friend, Stephanie, and started her on Nutramigen to see if I noticed a difference. I can say that my suspicions seem to have been correct! There are quite noticeable differences. It seems to be healing her digestive tract and we will continue her on it for the next few weeks and then slowly introduce her to soy products. She is not a picky eater, either. She will eat anything I give her.

She is sleeping much better than she did on all of my other visits. She only woke up once in the night for a diaper change. Tomorrow we will try to go the the artisian market and get a few things to bring back.

"Jake, we miss you like CRAZY!!!! I cannot wait for you to hold your baby sister!!! Only a few more days. I will be ready for you to run into my arms.... I need your hugs and kisses. I love you to infinity and more....."

Now, here are a few pics of her in her embassy outfit.... I will do a better job of taking more pictures this weekend. Now, that we are done, it will be less stressful and more enjoyable... so keep on stopping by! And please, pray for her to begin to turn her heart toward Jeff. I know it will get better and time will help, but I also know how badly he wants to love on her and play with her and can't. It is hurting my heart for him. Thanks!

Presenting..... Bella with Mommy and Daddy FOREVER!!!!!!!!

2007-10-25T21:11:00.000-04:00

We are here!!! Sorry, I did not have time to post sooner. She is PERFECT!!! When we got to the hogar, she was asleep, and they woke her up and handed her to me. Needless to say, she was not happy! She whined and whimpered off and on there. She would not make eye contact with me there or on the car ride to the hotel. When we got to our room, I fixed her a bottle and held her so that she was facing me, while I fed her. At first, she was avoiding looking at me and then our eyes locked and it was as though she had a memory trigger.

You see, back in October last year, we first visited her and she was only 1 month old (turned on month old the day we left). Everyone that saw us commented on how intently she looked at me. They said it was as though she was "memorizing me". Well, I think they were correct, because I saw that light come on and her whole demeanor towards me began to change. The way I was feeding her, is the way I have fed her everytime I visited! Isn't God good?!

After that, we took and bath and played in the tub. She started looking up at me and puckering her lips to kiss me. Then she just smiled. She did that all night long until she finally fell asleep in my arms! Now, she will NOT let Jeff in her space. He can look at her, but not for too long! I think this may be because she is not used to being around men in the hogar. I feel sure that she will be better with him tomorrow. She ended the night with her "talking" to him, but he was not allowed to respond! :)

Now, here is what you have been waiting for.....

Guatemala or Bust....

2007-10-23T19:57:00.000-04:00

Can you say PINK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! yep, we have an appointment for ........ FRIDAY!!!! Yes, the answer to the question you are asking yourself (and me) is THIS Friday!!!! We leave for Guatemala Thursday morning, appointment Friday and home to the US Tuesday. One week from tonight, I will be boarding a plane in Houston to come home with my daughter!!!!!!!!! I need to go back and look to see who was closest and notify the winner of my guessing game!

I won't post again until Thursday afternoon when we have Bella FOREVER!!!!!!!

Thank you Heavenly Father for this miracle and thank you to all of our family and friends and friends I have made in blog land. Your prayer, support and encouragement helped get us to this point. Have a good night and check back Thursday!!

On the way!!!

2007-10-22T23:38:00.000-04:00

We got our tracking number this afternoon! Our DNA results are en route to the embassy and scheduled to arrive tomorrow!!!!! We finished up Bella's room tonight and I will post pictures later... I am exhausted. I already have her clothes out. The only thing I have left to buy are new bows-- she has hair now!!! I am going to go after school tomorrow. I cannot believe it. We should have our appointment by Wednesday afternoon. Within 48 hours I will know for sure when Bella will be home!!!!!! Now, I am going to TRY to get some sleep!

Oh, before I do, I know most of you know by now that my attorney is Susana Luarca. I know people in the adoption world have heard about the incident that took place at PGN on Thursday afternoon. Jeff spoke with Susana from her hospital room on Sunday afternoon. She told us the whole story and I believe her 100%. I know we had a hard time with our adoption and we were put in some problem situations that held up our bringing Bella home earlier, but I do not for a minute think that the accusations that PGN are bringing against her are true. Yes, she kicked out the glass, but we don't know how threatening the situation was at that time. Please pray for this situation and for the children in the hogar. Things are very violatle in Guatemala right now and the children need to be our uttmost conecern. Pray for her recovery and pray for her cases not to be stalled because of this. The PAPs and the children do not need to suffer and we need God to intervene for the children! She was scheduled to be released today and plans to resume her cases. As of Sunday, she had already hired a driver and was planning to work this week. Rest assured, this has not silenced her. She told us about things she is working on for the grandfathering of cases to occur. I will let you all know if we hear anything else about it.

Oh, Yeah...

2007-10-19T19:16:00.000-04:00

God is good! I just got home and guess what I found in my mailbox? Yep... Our new I171H that we needed to show that our fingerprints had been updated. What does this mean? Well, it means there is NOTHING that will stop us from getting PINK next week!!! I e-mailed Lab Corp this morning and they sent a reply telling me to check with them Monday. The results should be sent out then. It is looking more and more like we will have an appointment the week of Oct.29- Nov.2. I am thinking it will be Oct.31 or Nov.2. We could be leaving next weekend!

I have a question that some of you may answer... I heard that the embassy is not doing appointments on Thursdays now. If this is true, then when do you pick up your visa if you have a Wednesday appointment?

Well, we will be spending our weekend watching LSU beat Auburn!!! :) and putting the finishing touches on Miss Bella's room. So, Sunday will be the unveiling and the long awaited pictures of the room. Stay tuned... next week is gonna be a GOOD one!!!!!!

Oh, tomorrow Bella turns 13 months old. It will be the LAST "birthday" she spends without us!

This Family Needs Your Prayers and Support

2007-10-18T23:11:00.000-04:00

PLEASE Pray for Xiomara and the Wheeler's...

This is the Wheeler's and their sweet baby girl Xiomara whom they are FIGHTING to adopt in Guatemala. A few weeks ago they received some excruciating news...

"We received an e-mail from Steve in Guatemala telling us that precious Xio's court date was yesterday.....we had no idea! And, needless to say, it did not go well at all. Our precious girl is actually not even from Guatemala.....she is from El Salvador. Her mother came to Guatemala from El Salvador to sell her illegally. She was offered a sum of money....and ended up getting less than she wanted. At court yesterday, the birth mother, foster mother, Xiomara, lawyer and Shyrel were there. There was obviously a lot of lying going on.....and the end result is not good at all. The judge did not trust any of the ladies, but for some reason is giving Xio back. We are trying to reach Steve. But, it seems as if she is headed back to El Salvador with a woman that does not even want her. Steve stated in the e-mail that she would be going back to a bad situation. Money is a shady thing.....and more than likely, she will be selling her again soon. We have more questions.....and will not give up."

PLEASE PRAY FOR XIOMARA!! Only God can protect her and deliver her into the arms of this sweet family who longs to love her and take care of her!! GOD YOU ARE SO MIGHTY! LORD, PLEASE BE XIO'S ALMIGHTY PROTECTOR AND SHIELD AND KEEP HER SAFE FROM HARM!

You can encourage this family by visiting their blog, http://thewheelerjourney.blogspot.com

One year ago today....

2007-10-18T06:47:00.000-04:00

Jeff and I traveled to Guatemala to meet our baby girl. One year ago today, I held Bella for the first time. One year ago today, I fell head-over-heels in love with the daughter for which I had cried and prayed many, many days and nights. One year ago today, if you would have told me that she would still not be home that time next year, I would have quit because I did not think I was strong enough to endure. Thank God that He did not give me that insight, but instead a glimpse into what He had in store for our family. One year ago today, I met a girl, named Stephanie, that would become one of my most dear friends on earth! One year ago today, my heart grew in love.

Today, we are so close to bringing Bella home. I would ask for you to please pray for one more thing for us. Our fingerprints expired October 12 and we had them renewed on October 2. We still have not confirmed that the U. S. Embassy has received the new ones through a confirmation. Without the wiring of them taking place, we may not be able to get PINK next week and Bella will be trapped there because of a U. S. problem. I have sent our congressman and senator, along with the embassy, e-mails explaining our dilemma and am praying that gets us somewhere. I will keep you posted. For now, I leave you with a few pics from our first meeting with Isabella, as well as a poem I "stole" from a friend's blog.

Have a great day!

Kisses in the Wind

I hold you in my heart and touch you in my dreams, You are here each day with me, at least that's how it seems. I know you wonder where I am... what's taking me so long,But remember child, I love you so and God will keep you strong. Now go outside and feel the breeze and let it touch your skin...Because tonight, just as always, I blow you kisses in the wind.May God hold you in His hand until I can be with you. I promise you, my darling, I'm doing all that I can do. Very soon, you'll have a family for real, not just pretend. But for tonight, just as always, I blow you kisses in the wind.May God wrap you in His arms and hold you very tight. And let the angels bring the kisses that I send to you each night. --Unknown

We love you, Baby Girl, and are trying with all our might to get to you! It will be soon.... hang on!

Love, Mommy, Daddy, and Jake

It just keeps getting better and better..... :)

2007-10-17T19:29:00.000-04:00

I e-mailed Pat at LabCorp this morning at 6:00 asking her to let me know when my sample arrived. I was thinking it would be there tomorrow or possibly Friday. She e-mailed me back 20 minutes later and told me she would be on the lookout for it. Well.... at 12:30, I got another e-mail telling me the sample arrived this morning, she pulled it and began testing it already!!!

Now, my friend's sample got there a few weeks ago on a Wednesday and it was back at the embassy on Friday-- 2 days later!! I am praying that this is the case with ours. She got PINK the following Monday. That means... we could and should be getting PINK somewhere between Monday and Wednesday of next week!! Right now they seem to be running 7-8 days out for PINK appointments. So, technically, we could have an appointment Oct. 29, Oct. 30 or Oct. 31!!! If our appointment is on the Monday (Oct. 29) or Tuesday (Oct. 30), we will be leaving for Guatemala next FRIDAY!!!! Now, I know that I should not be getting excited yet, but I cannot help it. Even if the appointment ends up being the following week, we KNOW we will be with Bella within the next 2 weeks!!!!!!!!!

So, please keep those prayers coming. She is ALMOST home!!!

Now... I have been tagged by RoseAnn. I must say... I have never been tagged before. So, here goes...

Jobs I Have Had
cashier
teacher

Places I Have Lived
New Iberia
Rayne
Crowley
Baton Rouge
Denham Springs

Foods I Love
chips and salsa
spaghetti (any kind of pasta, actually)
Caesar salad
Route 44 Dr. Pepper with extra ice from Sonic... I know it is not a food, but it is my vice :)

Places I Would Rather Be
Guatemala with my Bella on our way home NOW

TV Shows I Watch (I DVR them all weekly!)
Criminal Minds
House
K-Ville (I do live in Louisiana and endured Katrina)
Law & Order- SVU
Law & Order- Criminal Intent
CSI Miami
American Idol
24

Books I Love
Christian fiction
People Magazine

I am tagging
Jami
Kristin
Stephanie

YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :)

2007-10-15T23:55:00.000-04:00

"My 2nd DNA test was done today! I am one more step closer to come home to my Mommy, my Daddy, and my good-looking big brother, Jake!"

Well, you heard it from Bella... the DNA test was done today. Not sure when it will make it to Lab Corp, but I am hoping it will be within the next few days. I am hoping our appointment date will be the week of the 5-8. We plan to go down 2-3 days early. I can't wait to get my hands on that precious baby girl!!

A HUGE thanks to Jane for getting these for me!!! You are the BEST!!

PICS!!!!

2007-10-14T22:55:00.000-04:00

Tomorrow is a SPECIAL day!

2007-10-14T18:27:00.001-04:00

Tomorrow is the day that Bella gets her 2nd DNA test done!! Since our lab is LabCorp, we should have the results back at the embassy next Monday or Tuesday. I cannot believe that we will be with her in 2-3 weeks. We are planning to go down a few days before our appointment. I will keep you posted.

COME ON PINK!!!!!!!

I will try to post new pictures of her soon. Blogger is not cooperating right now.

What is YOUR favorite color?

2007-10-11T18:40:00.000-04:00

Mine is ORANGE!!!!

We are ORANGE!!!!!!!!!! We got submitted to the Embassy today and are waiting to find out when DNA will be done. Not sure when we should be traveling. ANY GUESSES???????

I have some of THE cutest pics of Bella evah... but Blogger will not let me post.

Be sure to leave your guess of our travel time... there may be a PRIZE!!!!! :)

Waiting on ORANGE....

2007-10-09T14:13:00.000-04:00

We were supposed to be submitted to the Embassy today. I am waiting to find out if that happened. For those of you not familiar with the lingo of Guatemalan adoptions, we are waiting on ORANGE. This refers to DNA authorization for our second DNA test to be done. This is required before our U. S. Embassy will issue us an appointment to get Bella's VISA.

I have not been following this part of the process. For those of you that have gotten ORANGE, could you leave a comment and tell me if you were given the authorization the day you were submitted to the embassy or if it happened after. Thanks!!

I will keep you posted and let you know the minute (or real soon afterward) that we get ORANGE!!! (This is my new favorite color... soon to be PINK!) :)

Casa Quivira Babies Need Your Help!!

2007-10-07T10:19:00.001-04:00

Casa Quivira Babies Need Your Help!!

2007-10-07T10:11:00.001-04:00

This is another hogar (orphanage) in Antigua, Guatemala. Bella is not in this hogar, but it could have been hers. In fact, there is no guarantee that this will not begin happening to all the hogars throughout Guatemala. Please make that phone call. Plead with our government to step in and do something so that ALL cases in process can continue under the new Ortego Law. If the amendment does not pass on Tuesday, many of my friend's children-- children they have met and cared for and fallen in love with-- will never come home to a loving family. Guatemala's government is not prepared to care for the orphans. Families here are and may not be allowed to because of monetary and political reasons. These children do NOT deserve to be tossed to and fro. PLEASE make the phone call! Also, PRAY... for the children that were in this home and for their families. I know what we have been through and it was hard. But... it does not compare with what these families are experiencing. Pray that this does not begin to happen all over Guatemala and its hogars. Thank you.

Beautiful BIG Smiles! :)

2007-10-04T20:15:00.000-04:00

Know what these 3 photos have in common? My BIG smile! Know why I am smiling SO big?...

My name changed today... that is right... my Mommy and Daddy got my new Birth Certificate declaring them my parents FOREVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thanks for ALL the prayers and encouragement..... I am DEFINITELY coming HOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tommy, move to the side and make room for me in Tiger Country... I'll be home for LSU Homecoming!!

Susana e-mailed us tonight with the good news. Her passport will be done tomorrow and then, U.S. Embassy on Tuesday (they are closed on Monday because of Columbus Day). We should have the 2nd DNA done by Wed. or Thurs. next week. We are hoping for PINK by the week of the 22nd and travel within 2 weeks from then. Realistically, we are looking at the last week of Oct. or first week of Nov. It just depends on how long the DNA results take to make it back to the U.S. Embassy.

GOD IS SOOOOOO GOOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THANK YOU, FATHER for seeing us through!

Bad Movie...

2007-10-03T19:01:00.000-04:00

I feel like I am the main character in a really bad Lifetime Movie of the Week. The Ortego Law was approved today in Guatemala and that is NOT a good thing. On Tuesday, there will be the 4th and final reading. At this time, they will decide if and what amendments are going to be allowed for current adoptions. Here is an explanation that I found on a friend's blog (thanks Krystal!):

"The Guatemalan Congress has passed the Ortega Law. Birthmothers currently have the right to relinquish their child for adoption, to know who will care for the child during the process, and to know that the child is going to America. This law takes those rights away. Also, unless an amendment is passed, this law says that our adoption is now null and void. This law also says that the home in which Bella is currently receiving care, will no longer receive any funding from adoptions --it is currently 100% funded by adoption fees. The law provides no place for them or the thousands of children in this situation to go. The implementation date has not been set, but it could be as soon as 30 days. There is still hope for the amendment, that the Children's Committee is working on, to allow our adoption to be processed under the law in which it was initiated, but this is a huge knock against us and other in-process families."

Since we don't yet have Bella's birth certificate (she was supposed to try to get it today, but I am unsure if she was successful, given this occurring), we are still considered an "in-process case". If the BC is not issued, the passport done and we get to the U.S. Embassy before the law goes into effect (which could be at least 30 days), then we may not get Bella home.

I am not sure how I am "digesting" all of this. When my friend called to tell me that this had happened, I felt an overwhelming peace. We have been through SO much this year. We hit EVERY possible snag and overcame some IMPOSSIBLE scenarios. To think that all of it was in vain and my baby girl may not make it home to us, is not something I want to ponder for any length of time. I am still believing that Bella is coming home. We just are so close, yet so very far away.

To all my readers, please be in prayer, not just for Bella, but for ALL the families in process. This is a very scary time for all of us. For those of you that are not adoptive parents, imagine for a minute that your child- your heart- was trapped in a foreign country and you could not get him or her out. How would you be feeling right now? We may not have given physical birth to these children, but I assure you, we have been in LABOR for a long time. We have held these precious children, fed them, taken care of them... fallen head-over-heels in love with them, and then left them numerous times, to continue with our daily lives here. They are OURS and it is just too hard to go down without a fight.

And, I don't know if you remember my friend, Jane, that I told you about in August. She is trying to adopt Lucas. She has been visiting him for a year and he knows her as Mommy. She is at the Appeals Court waiting to get a Certificate of Abandonment to begin his adoption officially. Please pray for her. She is scared that she will never get him home with the passing of this law. She is not considered "in process" because she does not yet have a COA for him. She is devastated, as you can imagine. This is the little boy that carried around his photo album of his family in America-- their pictures, pics of his new home, etc- the ENTIRE time I was with them in Guatemala in July. Keep her and him in your prayers, please.

To quote my friend Krystal (http://www.braydenboy.blogspot.com/):

"We will not stop fighting for Bella, but the battle just got bigger!"

Words cannot describe

2007-10-02T21:35:00.000-04:00

We did not get the birth certificate. Jeff is talking to our attorney as I type and she is assuring us that there is nothing that can stop our adoption. It is just a matter of time. She plans to "make some noise" with the director of the civil registry tomorrow morning. If anyone can do this for us, it is Susana (our attorney). She will fight to the end. Please continue to pray. Pray specifically for her to say the right words that need to be said to the director that will get our BC. I do not want to have to deal with court orders or criminal charges in order to get our birth certificate.

I want to thank all of you for your prayers, encouragement and kindness during this process. This has been THE hardest thing I have ever done and right now I can not begin to describe the hurt in my heart. I feel like I have been shattered into a million pieces. I love Bella and desire for her to be part of our family. God is in control and I will watch to see how His plan for our lives unfolds.

I admit I broke down, but I just went to my Bible and found these verses:

"For when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow." James 1:3

"I am willing to endure anything if it will bring salvation and eternal glory in Christ Jesus to those God has chosen." 2 Timothy 2:10

"You can be sure that the more we suffer for Christ, the more God will shower us with his comfort through Christ." 2 Corinthians 1:5

This next one will be the hope I cling to in the days to come.
"Without wavering, let us hold tightly to the hope we have, for God can be trusted to keep his promise." Hebrews 10:23

Amanda

Tomorrow should be THE day!

2007-10-01T23:50:00.000-04:00

Well, got news from my attorney that our BC will be ready tomorrow and she is going PERSONALLY to get it! We are praying that the CR will be true to their word and she will leave with the paper declaring Isabella Claire our daughter!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It will be special because tomorrow is the day we RENEW our fingerprints... the least the CR can do is release the birth certificate... after all, it IS their fault we have to do this. Our fingerprints expire Oct. 12 and if they would not have been difficult we would have made it. But they can redeem themselves..... :)

I hope you will be stalking tomorrow for our GOOD news!!!!!!!!!!

Fix Your Eyes

2007-09-28T18:34:00.000-04:00

This song has really helped me this week. The lyrics have been soothing to me. I chose to keep my eyes fixed on Him during this time of uncertainty in Guatemalan adoptions. Even if you are not in the middle of an adoption, I challenge you to fix your eyes where they belong-- on HIM! If you have not heard any of Jeremy Riddle's music, I encourage you to run out and get his CD. The title is Full Attention. Have a great weekend!

Here are the lyrics and you can click on the link to hear a piece of the song. (it was all I could find.) You will need to click on the song Full Attention. I know this is complicated, but I am not very computer savvy! :)

http://www.vineyardmusic.com/usa/scripts/prodView.asp?idproduct=823

May Your voice be louder
May Your voice be clearer
Than all the others, than all the others

May Your face be dearer
May Your words be sweeter
Than all the others
Than all the others in my life

Please keep my eyes fixed on You
Please root my heart so deep in You
Keep me abiding, keep me abiding
Keep me abiding that I
Oh, that I might bear fruit

May Your presence be truer
May Your presence be nearer
Than all the others, than all the others

May Your light burn brighter
May Your love go deeper
Than all the others
Than all the others in my life

From: Full Attention by Jeremy Riddle

Nicol Sponberg- Resurrection

2007-09-27T17:57:00.001-04:00

Prayers Needed Like NEVER Before

2007-09-27T00:41:00.000-04:00

We got word from our attorney tonight that PGN has contacted the Civil Registry and told them not to record any of the adoptions from La Primivera, which is the hogar Bella is in. It is all dealing with the article in the Prensa Libre earlier this month. She is going there tomorrow to try to fight it. PGN does not have the legal right to do this, but they are doing it anyway. This is serious and I will be honest and say that I am scared. Please pray for favor tomorrow. I believe this is one last push from the enemy to stop this adoption of Bella and I just have to muster ALL faith and hope I can find that he will not prevail, but will be defeated. I appreciate every one's prayers.

NOTHING!

2007-09-25T22:47:00.000-04:00

Sorry... nothing to report. We cannot get any answer as to if anything happened today. I honestly don't understand how you can give someone the news we were given last night and add everything else we have encountered and just not answer. Needless to say, sleep won't be happening for me and Jeff tonight... and quite possibly many nights to come.

Thanks for the prayers and words of encouragement you are sending our way. Someone commented and said "at some point, words become pointless"... that is a good way to sum it up... that and UNBELIEVABLE!!!

Here we go again...

2007-09-24T22:06:00.000-04:00

Well... no birth certificate. I just found out that the Civil Registry will not issue a birth certificate because they want to make sure PGN says it is okay to do so since we were approved by a judge instead of by them. News flash... they will not be okay with it, hence the article that came out Labor Day. As you may remember, our name and case was listed in the Prensa Libre as one of the 10 cases they did not want to be approved. At this point I don't know what to say or do. If this were a movie script being submitted to a director, it would never make it to the big screen because it is so unbelievable! Please pray that God will intervene and Bella will come home this year.

My Strength

2007-09-23T21:56:00.000-04:00

I will be truthful and tell you that I have been VERY weary these past few months. Bella turned one last week and we have been approved for over 2 months, been waiting on a BC for 3 weeks and still don't know when we will be able to travel to bring her home. We have to renew our fingerprints and possibly do a homestudy addendum because of the age of the child for which we were approved. There is no reason for her to not be home with us, except that we got caught up in political fights and Bella got "bounced to and fro" between those involved. It has been hard to accept the fact that we are bringing home a toddler that probably speaks some Spanish words and understands no English ones, that we have missed LOTS of firsts, and that she will probably go through more grieving than we were anticipating. I have spent most of my days this month crying-- crying more than I have ever cried before. With that being said, let me tell you what the Lord has shown me today.

I have been saying that I am just so weary and angry and did not think I could go on much longer. I have had times of doubt-- doubting that we even heard from God to begin this adoption; doubting IF she would come home at all. I know that sounds horrible, but if you will be honest, I know there have been times you doubted when you got weary from the battles that came your way. I have been going to the wrong places to get me through this. I was reading blogs and forums, instead of reading His Word. His Word that could get me through the tough days. Tonight, I went straight there when I began to feel the urge of defeat and depression try to hit my mind. This is what I found:

"As for God, His way is perfect; the word of the Lord is tried. He is a Shield to all those who trust and take refuge in Him. For who is God but the Lord? And who is a Rock except our God? God is my strong Fortress; He guides the blameless in His way and sets him free. He makes my feet like the hinds'; He sets me secure and confident upon the heights." II Samuel 22:31-34

My Bible has a Life Point for some of the verses and these particular verses happened to have one. Here it is:

"God is our Strength, our Rock and our Fortress. He asks us to put our faith in Him and to believe that we can do whatever He asks us to do. He is mighty to uphold us and to make us stand. He will support us and keep us from falling. God's strength is readily available to us, and we receive it through believing the promise He has made to give it to us. If we believe we are weak, then we will only manifest weakness, but the Bible says 'Let the weak say, I am strong!'. (Joel 3:10) When we can say we are strong with a heart of conviction- even though we are weak in ourselves- the Lord will be strong in us, and we will experience victory in our lives!" Joyce Meyer (from her Bible)

WOW! His Spirit really began to minister to me. This has been hard for me... but in some ways it was my fault. I should have let HIM carry my burden and rested in His promises. He wants to gird us with strength for EVERY battle that we face, but WE must allow Him to. That is what I struggle with all the time-- losing that control over my circumstances. This adoption of my daughter did not pan out the way I wanted it to, BUT it is according to HIS plan for us. I may be weary, but if I remember that He called us to this and He will give us the strength to endure to the end. He ALWAYS finishes what He starts!

We still do not have a birth certificate and without that we cannot get her passport. Once that is done, we still have 4 weeks or so before we get to travel to bring her home. We are probably looking at a November pick up and that is heartbreaking to me. BUT I will spend those weeks getting stronger in His Word and allowing Him to have HIS way with our lives.

I would like to leave you with one more verse:

"In my distress I called upon the Lord; I cried to my God, and He heard my voice from His temple; my cry came to His ears." II Samuel 22:7

That verse reminds me that He has seen EVERY tear I have cried and heard every groan that has come from my mouth as I agonized over missing my daughter. I began to look back over the past 2 years and was amazed at the things I told God was not fair or not right, only to realize those things played a huge part in bringing us to Bella. Had He not allowed those things to happen to me, I would have missed out on His best for me. I will dwell on that truth and realize that my precious baby girl is even more precious to Him and He has her best interest in mind. She WILL be home and it will be the day He has appointed even before she was formed in the womb.

Thank you for your continued prayers and I look forward to posting GOOD news soon. I pray that you will let Him be YOUR strength in whatever you are facing today.

Happy Birthday, Jake and Bella!

2007-09-20T00:46:00.001-04:00

Happy birthday, my precious little ones.

Jake, I cannot believe you are 8 years old already! You are growing into such a wonderful young man. You make me laugh everyday. You are the light of my life and my heart. You are smart, kind, witty, and very good-looking. I admire your faith and ability to see the good in everyone and everything. God has BIG things in store for you and it is such a blessing to watch it unfold and be a part of helping you find your destiny in Him.

Isabella, I cannot believe that a year has already passed. We were hoping you would be here to celebrate your first birthday with us. We have missed so many firsts in your first year of life, but God has begun to show me the many more He will give to us. I do not understand His plan-- the whys of you not being here today, but I must trust that this is how it is supposed to be. God brought you into our lives and He will bring you home to us in His perfect timing. The thing that breaks my heart most is that you will be in the hogar in another country while we are here celebrating without you. But, my prayer is that God will wrap you tightly in His arms and love on you by His sweet Spirit in our stead. You will be here soon and we will make up for lost time. I have only been with you 3 short times, but I have fallen head-over-heels in love with you-- more each and every time. You are the daughter I prayed so long for. I know that today will be hard for your birthmom. I pray that the Lord gives her comfort and lets her know that you are loved by many and will be forever. God has BIG plans for you, Bella, and Daddy and I feel privileged and blessed to be able to guide you into your destiny. We are coming to you soon, my baby girl!

2 weeks down.... how many more to go?

2007-09-17T21:21:00.001-04:00

Well, toady marks 2 weeks since we were submitted to the Civil Registry. Our BC is coming from Guatemala City and I am hearing it is taking right at about 3 weeks! Bella and Jake will both have a birthday on Thursday. Bella will be 1 and Jake will be 8. I am praying that we get our BC on that day. After all, we named her 2 days BEFORE she was born and Jake prayed for her to be born on his birthday. Let me tell you that story...

We were given a referral of a baby girl a week before Bella was born, but there was something wrong with the paperwork-- something that could cause us problems later on. We decided not to accept it. I was totally at peace with that and for me that was odd. Everyone else was feeling bad, but I was at peace. A few days later(on a Sat.), our coordinator called and said that there was a baby girl that was scheduled to be born the following week sometime. She would call me back when she knew more. We were next in line for a referral, so this baby would be our daughter. Well, Jake's birthday was on that following Wed. and I got an e-mail on the Monday telling me that the birthmom would deliver by c-section on the Thursday. The first question I asked, was "who gets to name her?" She responded by telling me that we could, if we had a specific name. Well, that was a big answer to prayer. Those of you that know me, know that this was a major stresser from the beginning. I wanted my daughter to be called by the name we were going to give to her during the entire time she was away from us. Well, He answered that one for me! Anyway... the night before Jake's birthday, as we said prayers with him, he prayed that his "baby sister would be born on his birthday" the following day. As I left the room, I tried to explain to him that the c-section was already scheduled for the day after and that they don't change those dates. He said "we'll see, Mommy." Jeff called me a faith-killer as we left the room. I just did not want him disappointed. Hindsight, I was not instilling faith in him at all. (I later repented!) :)

Fast forward to the next day. While we were on our way home, my cell phone rang. I saw that it was my coordinator and told Jake. He said "she is calling to tell us Bella was born, I bet." Sure enough... she had been born 2 hours earlier!!! Faith of a child...

We always take Jake to Chuck E. Cheese on the night of his birthday and do his party with friends on the following weekend. Last year, I remember telling everyone that would listen that we had just had a daughter and that next year, she would be celebrating her 1st birthday with us there. Well, that will not be happening. I can think of nothing better than to make it an okay day than for us to get her BC on that day. That is what I am praying and believing for. Will you join me?

It breaks my heart that we will not be with her, but I have been praying that the Lord will give me peace and strengthen me and help me get through it. I plan to make it a very special day for Jake and pray that God will hold Bella a little tighter that day.

Thanks for all the prayers and e-mails of encouragement. It means so much to me that so many people care about us. I hope to post good news soon...

Back up....

2007-09-06T18:13:00.000-04:00

I know many of you are wondering what is going on. Well, we were one of the cases that was named in the article in the Prense Libre. Our case went through the judicial process that PGN is trying to have unapproved. When I found out, I decided it was best and safest to close my blog until I knew we were not one of the cases they were investigating. We were investigated, but by the grace of God, they did not choose to overrule the judge's decision. This has been a very long and trying journey. We have been out of PGN since Feb. and in with a FC judge since April. We went through 2 judges until we were finally approved this summer.

I found out on Monday that we have been submitted to the Civil Registry for a Birth Certificate. We should be getting it any day now. Please continue to pray. We have faced obstacles at EVERY turn. One day, I will share all of them with you and you will see what a MIRACLE it is that she lands in America!

I am amazed by the people that have contacted me this week showing their concern for us. My family and friends have been GREAT! I don't think I am able to wrap my brain around the fact that "strangers" care so much. But... this is a process that brings people together. It is an emotional roller coaster and I am so thankful to have you all along for the ride!

God has been good to us and I am beginning to see His hand at work, even through the turmoil. He has used it to stretch me, test me, and change me. I will admit that I failed many tests, but the thing I am most proud of is that I kept getting up and trying to pass more! My attitude was not always the best (okay, it was really bad at times), but I am not the same person I was when I started and I learned alot about myself. If I would have known that we were going to be dealt this hand, I would have told you that I will not survive it. People say "I don't know how you are doing this." All I can say is "the grace of God" and "the way I see it, I don't have a choice." I HAVE to keep going.

The BIGGEST thing I learned (and am still learning) is that HE is in control of my life and I am in control of my choices. Does that make sense? What I am trying to say, is that I realize I must relinquish MY desires and TRUST HIM. That is very hard for me. I like to control the circumstances in my life. This entire process has been OUT OF MY CONTROL and that is what I have fought so hard against. Have I conquered it? NO WAY!!!!!! But... I am a little bit more accepting of it and with each situation He places me in the future, I will get better.

Stay tuned for good news...

Sara Michele Needs your prayers

2007-08-30T22:44:00.000-04:00

I have a friend that is in the same position that we have been in. Her name is Jennifer and her baby girl is 6 days older than Bella. They are in the same hogar and the judge is holding her certified copies, too. This precious baby needs to come home to her Mommy and Daddy. Tomorrow at 8:30 (Guatemala time), there is an important meeting that is going to take place. Please pray that the Lord moves on the judge's heart and that she would release Sara Michele. God did a miracle for Bella and He can do it for Sara. I look forward to posting her good news tomorrow night!

Guess what?......................

2007-08-29T22:46:00.000-04:00

"If you guessed that the judge gave up my certified copies, you are RIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! My Mommy and Daddy and my big brother, Jake, are coming to get me SOON!!! All of the prayers that went up to Heaven for me have been answered. Thank you all so much. I can't wait to meet all of these people that love me so much. Mommy did not know that when I gave her this BIG smile, she would need it to post my freedom from Family Court! Now, can I ask you for one more thing?.... I would like to be home before my Mommy and Daddy's fingerprints expire, which is Oct. 12. So, please say a quick prayer for that and stay tuned..."

Love,
Bella--soon to be Salemi! :)

Keep 'em coming!

2007-08-29T07:38:00.000-04:00

Keep those prayers coming... we are almost there!!!! I am hoping that I have good news to post for you this afternoon. I got a call last night and things are looking HOPEFUL! One last push...

Once again...

2007-08-27T22:27:00.001-04:00

We have hit another BIG snag in our adopiton and if ever there was a time we needed a miracle, it is now. Please pray that the heart of the judge will be changed tomorrow. Things are getting bad and we need God to step in and fix this mess. Thank you! Tommorrow is a big day for our case. I will keep you posted.

Thanks SBP!

2007-08-23T22:21:00.000-04:00

I just wanted to say thanks to my SBP. I received the special package and let me tell you... my son was ELATED! My wonderful SBP sent Jake a football and Bella the cutest outfit. It really meant alot to Jake that you thought of him. I know he must sometimes feel lost in this process and you really made his day!

I will take a picture of him with his football this weekend and post it and also post a picture of the outfit.

Thanks again... can't wait for the big reveal! :)

New Pics and another prayer request

2007-08-22T22:59:00.000-04:00

My friend, Jane, took these for me today. She even called me and held the phone next to Bella's ear for me to talk to her! She says she is happy and healthy. I miss her more than words can say and feel like my heart is breaking. We are so close, yet so far away. Still no ceritifed copies. Please pray that NOTHING will stand in the way tomorrow.

Jeff and I have a very close friend named, Dickey. He just found out that he has 2 brain tumors and they are operating tomorrow morning (Thurs.) at 5:00 A.M. One of them is jagged and has arms that are wrapping around his brain stem and down his spinal column. They found them the day after his wife was given the all clear from her cancer. They are going through a lot and need our prayers. We truly appreciate it.

11 months old today and not an end in sight to this horrible nightmare

2007-08-20T23:31:00.001-04:00

Well, another month has come and gone. We thought for sure we would be picking up our baby girl now, but instead, we are being held hostage by the 3rd family court judge our case has been with. We have been approved for 5 weeks and not progressed at all! She will not release the certified copies we need to get the birth certificate. I thought bouncing from judge to judge for 12 weeks was bad... NOT!!! I should be getting pictures of Bella this week because my friend is going to the hogar and will send some to me. But, stay tuned, if you miss these, you will get some next month. How do I know this? Because she will NOT be home when she turns 1 year old. To think I was so naive as to believe that when we accepted her referral on Sept. 20 (her birthday and my son's) last year that we would be celebrating it WITH her.

Backing Off

2007-08-13T21:29:00.000-04:00

Four weeks ago today we were finally released by a jugde after spending 11 weeks in FC. I still have no idea where we are in the final process and quite frankly I am hurting more than I ever have in this process. I am thankful for the support, prayers and encouragement I have received thus far. However, I have finally come to a place where I have to step back. I know many of you don't understand since we seem so close to the end and should have her home soon. One thing I have learned through all this, is that I should not expect anything as far as WHEN she will be home. My daughter will be 11 months old on the 20th and as far as I know we don't even have a BC.

I just wanted to let all of you know that I am sorry, but I am not reading blogs anymore. It just hurts too much to see babies home and I have no idea when mine will be. I know that sounds selfish or that I am jealous. I am not. I am glad to see that it does happen. It just hurts entirely too much. I don't like who I am. Everyday things are hard to enjoy. The daughter I have prayed for for 7 years is in an orphange in another country and I am missing every day of her life. Please continue to pray Bella home and if she happens to get here by Guatoberfest, then I will see you all there. I pray that happens. I know they say God's timing is perfect, I am just struggling to accept that these days.

There Is A Reason

2007-08-12T19:09:00.000-04:00

I am really missing my baby girl. Tomorrow will be one month since we were released by the judge. I am having a hard time today. I am weary and ready for this to be over. I am ready to enjoy things the way I once did before we began this adoption. A part of my family is missing and it makes my heart ache. My son is believing with all that is within him, that his baby sister is coming home for their birthday. I pray he is right! We start school tomorrow and the questions are going to begin.... "You don't have that baby yet?" I am not wanting to answer those. But... as I was cleaning my house this afternoon, I decided to turn on the radio and this is the song that was playing. Read the words and I pray that they minister to you like they ministered to me.

Cademon’s Call – There Is A Reason
From the album – Overdressed

Late at night I wonder why
Sometimes I wonder why
Sometimes I'm so tired
I don't even try
Seems everything around me fails
But I hold on to the promise
That there is a reason

Chorus:
Late at night, the darkness makes it hard to see
The history of the saints who've gone in front of me
Through famine, plague and disbelief
His hand was still upon them
Cause there is a reason
There is a reason

He makes all things good
He makes all things good
There's a time to live and a time to die
A time for wonder and to wonder why
Cause there is a reason
There is a reason

I believe in a God who sent His only son
To walk upon this world and give His life for us
With blood and tears on a long, dark night
We know that He believed
That there is a reason
There is a reason

Chorus:

For the lonely nights
And broken hearts
The widow's mite
In the rich man's hand
And the continent
Whose blood becomes a traitor

For the child afraid to close their eyes
The prayers that seem unanswered
There is a reason
There is a reason

SHOUT! SHOUT! SHOUT! Madalyn is OUT! OUT! OUT!

2007-08-07T23:11:00.000-04:00

Madalyn is coming home!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! God is so good!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I cannot begin to tell you how happy I am for Kristin and Greg. Kristin has maintained such a Godly attitiude during this process. She is truly one special Guatemama and I am so thankful that He has brought our pathes together. I CANNOT wait for our 2 girls to meet. Congratulations, Campbells!! We love ya'll!

Guatoberfest and school...

2007-08-06T12:42:00.000-04:00

I am soooo excited about Guatoberfest! I wasn't planning on going, but my wonderful hubby convinced me to go! It is going to be great to meet everyone that has walked beside me during this crazy journey and even meet new families I have not had contact with. Jeff can't make it, though, so it will be just me and the kids! How weird does that sound... kids... plural.

We are waiting to hear that we have a BC. I start school tomorrow... teacher in-services and classroom preparation. The students come next Monday. I thought it would be hard for me to begin the school year without Bella here, but amazingly, I am at somewhat of a peace about it. I will have time to get things in order for my absence and by then, we will be leaving. I am hoping we are on pickup by early to mid-September.

I have been focusing on the scripture in the Bible that says... "He will keep you in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on Thee." Every time I feel the anxiety of her being there and not here, I begin to meditate on that scripture and peace comes over me. It happened yesterday (the anxiety) and that verse popped into my mind. Things are nearing the end of this journey and we will soon begin a new one. I am beginning to get EXCITED about the new adventure we are about to enter.

Hope everyone has a great day and I will post when we get news of the birth certificate!

On to the civil registry!

2007-08-03T00:50:00.000-04:00

I found out tonight that the certified copies were obtained and we are being filed with at the Civil Registry! Not sure if that means we were already or will be. But... we are creeping along! We will have to do the 2nd DNA test, but at this point, I have gotten past it and just come to accept it. Not sure if we will have to redo our fingerprints- they expire Oct.12.

I went to see Evan Almighty with Jodi (Corryn's mom). It was her son's birthday. Jodi and I were amazed at the nuggets we gleaned from this movie considering the adoption process. I am not sure if you all have seen it, but I highly recommend it. There is a line at the end of it where Steve Corral (correct spelling?) tells Morgan Freeman, who plays God, "you knew what was going to happen all along, didn't you?" and "I fought you every step of the way", yet His plan still unfolded and it proved to be worth it all for him to have endured all he did. This is true for us. Steve could only see a small part of Freeman's plan, and none of his instructions or problems made since. In fact, they were down right ridiculous and cost him alot, personally.

This is how this journey is. He calls us to do something, we "figure" out how it will unfold and then get upset because we feel "due" something. When He called us to adopt Bella into our family, He had a very specific plan and it has not changed along the way. My plans have. This is not about me... it is about His plan for my family. My part is to pray and walk in the way He has prepared. I don't understand why we manage to hit EVERY potential roadblock to this process. I thought about something tonight. When you are driving and come to a roadblock in the road, you must go through the detour. It is for your own safety. You get aggravated because the journey to your destination will take longer, but along the way you see different scenery. Maybe, these roadblocks have changed the "scenery" of the life- lessons I need to learn to fulfill His plans for my life and the life of my children. If I would have stayed on the straight course, I may have remained stagnate in my walk with Him. If there is one thing I can say about this year, I am NO longer stagnate in my relationship with Him.

Stay tuned... it should be interesting how this comes to an end! If any of you know how long it is taking to get GCBC, please either post it or send me an email.

Wrestling, not resting

2007-08-01T10:02:00.000-04:00

I got "schooled"-- by my Heavenly Father. I layed in bed last night and pouted and complained about the unfairness of this and when I was done, I realized that I should be ashamed of myself. Things are not going like I had planned, but they are going like HE planned. He did a miracle for us while I was in Guatemala and when He did it, He knew the day she would be coming home. Us being released on that Monday was all part of His plan for our adoption from the beginning of time. It did not happen by chance because I was there. He did not do it on a whim, but by divine design. Just as He orchestrated that, He has a divine time for her to come home. That day has been established from the beginning of time and there is nothing I can do to change it and make it happen on my timetable. If she is not home by her first birthday, then she was not ever meant to be home by then (thanks, Kristin!). And if that if His way of doing this, then it is the perfect way. Wow-- that was a hard pill to swallow.

I believe that this adoption of Bella was God's perfect plan for me and my family. He began to plant the seed of desire for adoption in me at a very young age. It was something the I have always said I would do when "I grew up". We actually tried to start this 3 years ago and God shut the door. Thankfully, I was not so hard headed that I did not realize the timing was wrong-- we would have missed out on Bella! I guess what I am trying to say is that I have come to realize that this was not my idea. It was His; therefore, it is by His doing that she will come home. Not mine. Just like He knew when to begin to line all things up for this to start, He knows how to line all things up for this to end. My job is not to aid in that, but to REST in that. I have NOT been resting. Well, I take that back. I did rest for the past 2 weeks, while I thought things were going the way I wanted them to unfold. That is not true resting. I was finally sleeping and enjoying life around me. The minute I found out it may not happen on my timeline, I reverted back to my "miserable" mode. That, to me, is wrestling.

So, today, things are still very uncertain and I am okay with that. It may still work out. Who am I to limit God because of how things look in my many timeline scenarios? But, He may have a different plan. We may miss her first birthday and we may have to renew fingerprints and we may be subjected to the wait of the new DNA test. But guess what? That is no surprise to HIM. He knew it all along. I am just the one that took so long.

You see, I have been on a journey for the past 7 years to learn to truly trust Him. I have been a Christian since I was 12 years old, but I have always wanted to control my circumstances. I am a planner and planners must feel in control of the events in their lives. As a Christian, I cannot operate that way. I know He is using this in my live to teach me this. We feel called to the mission field to work with orphans in some capacity. I cannot do this, if I am always trying to have control. He loves me so much and wants me to fulfill His plan for my life. It's like with my son. I want him to happy, but more than that, I want him to learn to be the man of God he is supposed to be. Because of that being my greatest desire, I have had to watch him be hurt by our discipline, even when he doesn't understand it. Well, that is what God is doing. Trying to teach me what trusting Him truly is. Each setback we get, brings me one step closer. I am not naive enough to think that I will learn it toatlly by the time she gets home, but I do belive that I have made GREAT strides in this area this past year of our adoption.

For now, I will continue to pray for our miracle and rest in the assurance that He is STILL at work to bring her to our family. He never stopped. I just stopped looking at Him and began looking at the flood waters that were rising around me. Didn't He promise to be there when the flood waters tried to overtake us? :)

One more thing...

2007-07-31T23:54:00.001-04:00

What?... A SECOND DNA test... you've got to be kidding me. Can I not catch a break here?!

Trying to be optimistic and faithful, but am having a difficult time.

Nope

2007-07-31T01:04:00.000-04:00

Well, found out tonight that nothing has happened since I left Guatemala. We are supposed to have certified copies done tomorrow for the final deed. At this rate, if the timelines I am seeing on the message boards is correct about Guatemala City BC taking 2-3 weeks, we may not make her birthday. I cannot believe this. I know it hasn't happened yet, but after so many disappointments in this process thus far, I am finding it very difficult to remain optimistic. My son is praying hard that he gets to celebrate his birthday with his new sister. He really wants to be with her when she turns one and he turns eight. We already had plans for their big day. I pray that it happens. Please pray that with us. I cannot bear to think of telling him that he will miss it. After all, we got her referral on their birthday last year. We always celebrate it at Chuck E. Cheese and he is looking forward to showing "Bella how to have fun!" I am so weary.

Still waiting

2007-07-30T20:21:00.001-04:00

We are waiting to hear if we were submitted to the Civil Registry for a birth certificate. The BC is coming from Guatemala City and I hear they take the longest. I have a peace, but am still anxious to go get my baby girl. I will keep you all posted!

Please release Madalyn!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2007-07-25T01:40:00.000-04:00

Okay, bloggers, I need to ask for your prayers once again. This little girl is Kristin's beautiful daughter and Bella's future BFF. Her birthday is 6 days before Bella's and she needs to be home to celebrate. God did a miracle for us and I believe he can do a miracle for them. Please pray for her to be released from PGN now!!!!!! Kristin is such a mighty woman of God and she and her husband have been such a source of strength for my family. Let's rally around them and pray this precious baby girl home to her awesome parents.

"We love you Madalyn and are praying you home!!!"

Progress... hopefully

2007-07-23T23:04:00.000-04:00

We are supposed to be submitted to the Civil Registry for a birth certificate this week. I am hoping to get submitted to the Embassy by August. Please continue to pray for things to go smoothly until the end. I have such a peace now. I have slept soooo good this past week. I forgot what it felt like to sleep all night long and wake up feeling rested! I am also able to eat again and my appetite is making up for lost time!!!

I cannot tell you how much everyone's comments and prayers have meant to me and my family. I am amazed at how God brings strangers together into a family to walk beside you on this crazy journey. Please continue to pray for all of the other families waiting to get out of PGN. I want you all to know that I pray for each of you and your children each day as I check your blogs. I will continue to pray for you, even after Bella is home. God is faithful and HE will do it!

I am going to begin getting my classroom ready next week and may not be able to post or check many blogs. I will catch up on the weekend and pray I see good news posts when I do. I WILL post when we get the news of a BC and passport and submission to the Embassy-- I will not be too busy for that!

I love all of you!

2007-07-21T11:30:00.000-04:00

Thank you so much for all of your prayers. I started feeling better by last night and Bella is doing much better. I got a chance to talk with the hogar doctor when I went to drop her off and felt much better after he examined her and decided on a plan of treatment.

It was very difficult to leave her, but the most difficult part of the trip is about to happen. I am fixing to leave Guatemala and those of you that have done this before know how it feels when that plane takes off from the runway. You feel as though your heart is being ripped from your chest. It is a horrible feeling to leave your child in another country. But... good news...

We will be submitted to the Civil Registry for a birth certificate this week. Then she gets her passport and we are submitted to our Embassy for an appointment. To those of you unfamiliar with this step, it is referred to as waiting for PINK. I cannot believe I am posting these words. I thought this day would NEVER come. God is good and His ways are miraculous! We should be traveling to bring Bella home within 3-5 weeks. I am believing for a BIG miracle-- pickup before August 14. That is my first day of school and I want to be there to begin the school year. So... we will se if that happens. Pray!!!

I need to get to the airport, but I will post pics from yesterday's return to the hogar tonight. Thanks again to all of you for your prayers-- you helped bring Bella home.

SHE IS COMING HOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I AM SICK!!!!!!!!! PRAY!!!!!!!!!!!

2007-07-20T06:59:00.000-04:00

I think I have rotavirus. I just starated vomiting and it is coming out the other end, as well. Bella has the diarehha really bad. Please pray. I cannot give her back with this horrible virus-- she is too little!!!!!!!!!

My Bellaboo!

2007-07-19T23:14:00.000-04:00

Here are some pictures of the past few days. I have not been able to take many because she is sick and wants me to hold her alot. She definitely knows I am her mom. I will post more about how she is doing and what she is doing tomorrow night. I bring her back to the hogar between 4 and 5 o'clock. Please pray for me, but most importantly, pray for Bella. Pray that God guards her heart and helps her realize that I am not abandoning her. That bothers me. We have bonded REALLY well and I don't want that ruined because of the next few weeks without me. Also, she is sick-- congestion and ear aches. Please pray for her to be better before I have to leave her. Well...

here is Bella!! Enjoy!-- I have been :)

Things are moving quickly!!

2007-07-18T19:32:00.000-04:00

My attorney called this afternoon and told me she got our final adoption decree today!1 We will be submitted to the Civil registry next week!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

God is AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!

I will post pics later. Bella is sick with conjestion and ear ache. Pray for her, please!!

WANT TO KNOW WHY I AM SMILING?

2007-07-17T13:00:00.000-04:00

*************Edited to Add***********************************************************

We still need prayers. In PGN, when the judge signs a case, the final decree follows. With us coming from FC, we have to wait until the judge issues the decree. We were told that we should have it in 2-3 days. We need for the judge to issue the final decree quickly-- until then, she still has the case. I am excited, though, because we have been waiting for a judge to SIGN/APPROVE it for 11 weeks!! This is a MAJOR milestone! After the decree is issued, then everything in the final process is the same. Please continue to pray for things to go SMOOTHLY and quickly-- no holdups-- so she is definitely home for hers and Jakes birthday (Sept.20) We love and appreciate all of you.

Amanda

I AM COMING HOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
That's right--everyone prayed and God heard and answered with ALL of His might and power. My mommy went to see the judge today and found out that she signed it yesterday!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I will be home to celebrate my 1st birthday with my big brother, Jake and go see all of Mommy's blogging buddies in Atlanta! So....thanks for the prayers and thank you Jesus for bringing me home "in a blaze of glory"-- that's what Amelia's mom has been telling my mom all along!!!!!!!!

Love,
Bella

2007-07-16T19:48:00.000-04:00

Here are some more from this afternoon by the pool. Please pray hard tonight for our case. I will update some more tonight after she goes to sleep. I say"Give Mommy kisses" and she kisses me with the sweetest kisses ever!!!!

Sweet Reunion

2007-07-16T18:30:00.000-04:00

Finally!!!! She is amazing. I truly believe that God answered our prayers by the way she responded when she saw me. She knew me and has not taken her beautiful eyes off of me since. She is crawling and pulling up and has the cutest laugh. She is petite and so laid back. She is also amazingly limber. She practically sits in a split position. She is crying for me to hold her, so I will have to update with words tonight after she is asleep. For now, here are some pics to hold you all over

My Little Man

2007-07-15T03:05:00.000-04:00

Here are some pictures of my little man, Jake, from our vacation to Arkansas this past week. This first picture is of the street name that was right before our resort. We were all bummed that our Isabella (Bella) was not on this trip with us. Then, as we turned to get to our resort, there was a love note from God. Everytime we would leave and return, I would smile because I was reminded of my baby girl!

Enjoy!

Look at me and my cute teeth!!

2007-07-14T22:56:00.000-04:00

Next post...from the Marriott in Guatemala!!!

Thanks to Kristin!

2007-07-13T19:21:00.000-04:00

I want to say a special thanks to my new best friend, Kristin. She designed my beautiful blog header and revamped my blog layout. She and her friend, Yvette, have started a business called Page and Petals. Please visit them via the link on the right of my blog. They can help you get the blog of your dreams! :)

We are headed out of here tonight and Louisiana bound! Arkansas is beautiful, but I must say I miss my good ole Louisiana food!!!! We were supposed to head home tomorrow, but I want an extra night of sleep in MY bed and need some good food before heading to Guatemala on Sunday morning, bright and early.

I got new pics of Bella yesterday and, well, I cried my eyes out. She has grown so much!! She is beautiful and has a head full of hair now and 4 teeth. When we opened up the file, I looked at Jeff and tears just started flowing. Jake looked at them and asked me who that little girl was. When I told him it was his sister, he did not believe me. It took alot of convincing for him to realize that she has grown up that much. It broke my heart. I cannot believe that she will be 10 months old in one week and I am leaving for a visit trip. She should be home. There is no reason for it, except that we are suffering the political problems of adoption-- nothing majorly wrong with our case. Please continue to pray for our judge's heart to be changed and for her to release us from Family Court so that our precious, Bella can come home next month. We are believing that it will happen next week while I am with her and that the purpose of this trip will be for her to get to know me and when we return in a few weeks, the transition to us will be easier. I know... BIG faith for a BIG miracle. But, my God is BIG and He has grown my faith BIG on this journey!!!!

Next post, will be from Guatemala.... stay tuned....

Fun on vacation and Guatemala bound!!!!

2007-07-11T19:22:00.001-04:00

We are enjoying ourselves in Horseshoe Bend, Arkansas. Today we took Jake on a guided fishing trip and he caught the biggest and most fish of us all! We caught lots of rainbow trout and Jeff is cooking them as I type. I am leaving for Guatemala Sunday morning and will be getting Bella on Monday morning from the hogar.

I cannot believe this will be my 3rd visit trip. We really need everyone to PRAY that the Lord changes the heart of the judge our case is with. If she does not release us, I think we will have to reenter PGN and you all know what that means. It means we could be facing many more previos and not picking her up until the end of this year or beginning of next. I cannot bear to think of that happening. We have been in FC for 11 weeks now and each time we get close to being released, something happens and the judge changes their mind.

Many of you may remember that we waited a while for PA and we got a miracle on our last visit trip. We were to bring Bella back to the hogar on March 1. That was the day that the Protocolo was scheduled to be issued. I prayed that night and this is what I prayed: "God, it is going to be really hard to give my daughter back on this day that the Protocolo is being issued and not know how things are going to go with adoptions from here on out. We have been waiting for PA and it would mean so much to me if I opened my e-mail in the morning to an e-mail from the embassy granting us Pre Approval. Please do that for me." Well.... sure enough I went to my e-mail and found it THAT morning!!!!!!!

I cannot begin to tell you how badly I need to know that when I hand Bella back to the hogar, that she is MINE and that can only happen if we get released by next Friday. Please pray that this is where we get our miracle. It seems that we have caught one bad break after another. Bella will be one year old on Sept 20. That is the same day my son, Jake, will turn 8 years old. I do not want to celebrate one child's birthday here in the US and miss the first birthday of my other one. I NEED A MIRACLE and only GOD can do it!!!!

"Father, I pray that you will give us favor with the FC judge that holds our Bella's file. God, change her heart and have her release us now. As I leave Bella next Friday, let me have the assurance that the next time we see each other, it WILL be forever! I know nothing is impossible with you. So, please take this impossible situation and move in a mighty way for our family. Thank you. In Jesus' name, I pray. Amen."

Destination...

2007-07-04T22:35:00.000-04:00

I am going to Guatemala!!!!!!!--- to visit my baby girl!!!!!! Yep, I am going July15-21, so if any of you bloggers will be there at that time, let me know. I can't believe I will see her in 12 days. Now, I must go pack. We are leaving for our vacation Saturday and returning next Saturday and then I fly out at 6:30 Sunday morning. So, I have to pack for Bella now. Lots of outfits to prepare! :)

*************************************************************************************
Oh, if you love give-aways, you need to e-mail sig at Sa3@aol.com. Ask her for an invite to her blog-- you can enter to win some good loot! I just love these FUN guatemamas I have met on this journey!!!!!!
***************************************************************************************

Perspective and back to where I belong....

2007-06-29T16:23:00.000-04:00

I overheard my husband tell someone the other day, "I am ready for Bella to come home so that I can get my wife back." Those words have been ringing in my head ever since. I am so thankful for all you that read my blog, are concerned about Bella's adoption, and have prayed and encouraged me this far. Your words mean so much to me and my family.

I have been praying for the past couple of days about what God is doing and if He is requiring anything from me that I have not discovered yet. I think it was confirmed to me today. I am going to take a break from blogging and blogland. I have allowed myself to become obsessed with it along with checking my e-mail millions of times a day. (seriously, my send and receive button should be broken!) I have allowed this adoption to define me. It is not who I am. I am a daughter of my heavenly Father. He has a special plan for my life and the adoption of Bella into our family was His idea and part of His infinite plan for my life (as His daughter). He loves Bella more than I can fathom and He loves me that much, as well. With that said, things may look bleak for us in bringing her home any time soon; however, some of His greatest miracles happened at times that seemed like the end. (Lazarus being raised from the dead-- can't much more toward the end than that!)

Please continue to pray for us and her homecoming. Please continue to check here and watch for our miraculous news so you can rejoice with us. But for now, I am going to give my husband back his wife sooner, rather that later and rededicate myself to the Lord, to Jeff and to Jake. Later....

I miss her so much!!

2007-06-27T22:54:00.000-04:00

I miss her so much is hurts some times. I have not held her since she was 5 months old. I will have to start a new school year and did not get a chance to see her this summer. I long to kiss her, smell her, touch her, hold her, feed her, dress her, bathe her -- LOVE her!!! If I would have known then what I know now, I would have rat holed EVERY penny I spent on foolish things this past year so I could have a visit trip with her this summer. That reality hit me this week. Because I will need as much time as possible with her when she gets home, I will not be able to visit this summer. It is just not in our budget and that hurts. At times, I feel like she is a stranger. I mean, I love her with all of my heart, but yet our last time with her seems like a very distant memory. Is this normal?

I miss her so much! It dawned on me this week that she will probably be a year old or older when we bring her home and that makes me so sad. We started this process in April of 2006. On Aug. 6, we will begin a new school year and that makes it 3 different school terms that have gone by and the baby girl we have waited so long for will not be home yet. I never in a million years thought this would have happened.

I went to talk to my boss today. I just had to find out if I was going to have a job. He was so understanding and told me he would work with me. That was a big relief. I know that it is all happening this way for a reason. I have to believe that-- some days are easier than others to do so and some are harder. Today was one of the ones that got harder as the day ended.

The reality that we are bringing home a child that will be entering the toddler stage and not an infant hit me this week, also. She has likes and dislikes that I am not aware of. Her personality is being formed by someone that I do not know. I know she is being taking care of in the hogar, but it is not by me and that hurts. We never learned Spanish because we were supposed to bring home a baby and it would not be an issue. I know she is still young and will pick up English quickly, but my concern lies in the first time she is put into my arms for forever. I want to be able to comfort her so that she understands it will be okay. I guess that is where my trust in my Heavenly Father will come into play. I will need Him to fill in the gap, by His Spirit, for my baby girl.

This has been (and probably will continue to be), a roller coaster ride of emotions. In a way this event has been tragic for my family. We have run the gamut of emotions: fear, anger, anxiety, happiness, disappointment, just to name a few. I guess, even though I have come to accept this reality of ours, tonight I am just mourning what could have been and what I want. I know that tomorrow is a new day and with it brings a new opportunity for movement in our situation. So, I will cling to that and try to find my rest in Him.

A mini-vacation and a BIG lesson

2007-06-26T23:56:00.000-04:00

My husband and I decided to take Jake on a min-vacation at the beginning of June. Now, many who know me, know that I canNOT keep a secret. So, when Jeff told me not to tell Jake about this because he wanted to surprise him, I had a hard time. I almost slipped up several times.

The Saturday before we left, we had an end-of-the-season swimming party for Jake's baseball team. On the way there, Jake began to ask if he could either have a friend spend the night or go to a friend's house that night. (Now, remember, he did not know that our plans were to wake him up early the next morning and drive to Gulf Shores for a few days.) Knowing what we knew, we told him no. He got upset and said he did not understand why-- it was a weekend and we did not have anything else to do. It really hurt him that we were keeping him from having "fun" for no apparent reason. It broke my heart to watch him be so upset.

Now, because I cannot keep a secret, I talked Jeff into telling him later on. My OCD self could not see how I was going to manage to pack an entire family for 4 days at the beach without him seeing or figuring it out. Jeff, being the sweet husband that he is, gave in and we "surprised" him early. ;)

We had a BLAST and ended up staying an extra night because Jake's daddy is a pushover and could not resist his cute son begging to stay an extra night. He even cancelled some of his appointments to do so. (Thanks, Jeff!)

The point of this little story (and I do have a point in telling it) is not to bore you with the details of our travels, it is to share with you an important lesson my Heavenly Father taught me. Throughout this entire process, I had it all figured out-- I just KNEW Bella was going to be home at the beginning of the summer and I would have all summer with my baby girl and all would be well. I mean, after all, it made since that He would do it that way. Right? ..... WRONG! Up until this month, I had been kicking and screaming the whole way because I knew the BEST way for it to unfold.

On this mini trip I was struggling BIG TIME with being angry with Him. I did not understand why He would not give it to me this way. I asked repeatedly the "whys" and the "hows" and recited the "it's not fairs" of it all. I got down right sinful about it. (I am not proud of that either.) On the last day, as Jeff and Jake were packing the car to leave, I was sitting down watching them and I heard Jake tell his daddy "Daddy, thank you for taking me to the beach-- it was the BEST!" At that moment, I felt that still, small voice begin to speak to my heart. He began that day and has burned this lesson in my heart each day since.

This is what I learned: This adoption process is like our planned family mini trip and just like Jake had plans of his own for the weekend, so did I. When it did not work like Jake wanted it, he got upset with us. He cried and said some ugly things and while it hurt our heart (and we dealt with it appropriately), we understood where he was coming from. Our explanation of "it just isn't a good time" did not make sense to him. We knew that what we had planned was going to be far more exciting and fun and perfect for him than what he wanted. That is what my Heavenly Father spoke to my heart in that parking lot in Gulf Shores and speaks to me daily, when I get weak. He told me that it hurt His heart to watch us struggle with the whys and cry and hurt. Jake saw only the momentary satisfaction of that one day, but we saw the BIG picture of the entire week. We knew our plans for him were the best and that at the end of it all, he would recognize it, as well. God's plans to bring Bella into our family are far more greater and exciting than I could ever map out. He sees the BIG picture, while we see this little speck.

While, it is getting harder to endure this extremely hard place we are in with our adoption, He is making preparations for her to enter our family in a way that will far surpass our understanding and comprehension! While it may seem silly or elementary to all of you, that was so big to me. Even when I was "throwing" my fit, He loved me enough and cared for me enough to share some of the picture with me and it is this revelation that I find myself clinging to each day.

2007-06-25T21:15:00.000-04:00

We had the privilege of meeting Kristin and Greg in person this past Friday. Kristin and I met through blogging and have become best friends over night! They decided to drive 7 1/2 hours to come to visit and pray with us. Our daughters are 7 days apart and very strangely resemble each other. We thought it would be neat to meet together and pray for our girls to be released and come home soon. We literally talked for 13 hours before finally going to bed at 4:30 in the morning.

Her husband, Greg, and mine, Jeff, had never spoken a word to each other until they entered our house. It is amazing what each has in common and how much their personalities and sense of humor are alike. I cannot do this situation the justice it deserves, so please visit her blog, where she so adequately describes it.

I have said it before in past posts, and I will say it again. Our adopting Bella was so much bigger than bringing a baby into our family. We believe it is the start of the ministry God is calling our family to do. We are beginning to get a "glimpse" into what that may be. This weekend showed us just that.

Please continue to pray for Bella and Madalyn to be released very soon. We specifically need God's favor to fall on the right people.

Tomorrow I will post a MAJOR revelation God has given to me. IT IS GOOD~

Blogging Guatemamas!!

2007-06-21T17:57:00.000-04:00

Today, Jake and I had the privilege of meeting a fellow blogging momma-- Jodie . Check out her blog: http://flyhomeladybug.blogspot.com/ and see her beautiful baby girl, Corryn. We discovered last week that we live in the same city! How neat is that?! Her boys are so much fun and quite handsome, too! Jake made 2 really great friends today. In fact, they seemed like they had known each other for years! Jodie is great, too!! It felt like we, too, have been friends for years. I CANNOT wait to bring our babies home to Louisiana. Corryn and Bella will be the cutest little cheerleaders around! Jodie- as soon as I get released from FC hell, I am going to buy Bella a LSU dress like Corryn's. Hope you don't mind. ;)

We went shopping. She bought some REALLY cute outfits for Corryn. I did not buy anything because I still have not heard that our case was cleared with the FC judge. I can't stand to buy another piece of clothing that she may not be able to wear! :( We ate lunch at Chili's and were entertained by our crew of boys.

This has been a very frustrating process, but I am so thankful that I have met some really great women along the way-- women that will be friends of mine for many years to come. :)

But the fun doesn't stop there... check out my blog tomorrow to see WHO else is coming to visit this weekend!! I CANNOT WAIT....

2007-06-20T09:38:00.000-04:00

"Happy 9 month birthday, Baby Girl!!! We miss you sooo much and wish we could have celebrated this special day with you. "

Love you bunches,
Mommy, Daddy, and Jake

Counting My Blessings

2007-06-19T15:07:00.000-04:00

Today I want to celebrate my beautiful children!

Jake is 7 years old and the light of my life! He truly is my little miracle from the Lord. He is such a cool kid. He loves sports more than any child I know. He can talk about football and baseball-- quote player's stats and remember plays as well as any grown man. More than anything else, though, he has such a sweet spirit and a tender heart. I know that God has BIG plans for his life and I love watching him begin to fulfill them! I love you, Jake-a-doo!

Bella will be 9 months old tomorrow. My, how she is growing! Instead of dwelling on the things I have missed, I am choosing to look forward to the multitude of things I am going to experience with her. We prayed a LONG time for this miracle, and the Lord blessed us abundantly. She may not be here in Louisiana with us right now, but she is always in our heart and we KNOW that God is bringing her to us SOON-- He's just lining everything up perfectly right now! She has a sweet spirit, also. I know she has a special call on her life and I am blessed to have been chosen to help her find it-- with the Lord's help and wisdom. I love you, Bellaboo!

I love my children! "Thank you, God, for placing them into our family. Help Jeff and I to lead them to you."

Expecting...

2007-06-17T23:33:00.000-04:00

Please pray that the FC judge release our file THIS week!!!!!! I am EXPECTING God to answer our prayers. He has already begun to work out the details. Everything is beginning to line up. On Monday, I received a call from a good friend of mine that I have not spoken to since our visit trip in Feb. She wanted to know if Bella was home yet. I told her what was going on and she asked me what I was going to do for childcare. I did not go into detail, but just said that we were still working out the details of that. She told me she had been keeping her grandson and he would be starting preschool in Aug. She then said "Why don't you let me keep Bella?" I asked her if she was serious and she told me that she had been praying and wondering what she was going to do now that he would not be with her all day. The best part is that she is going to do it free of charge!!! I told her I wanted to pay her and she would not hear of it. BIG ANSWER TO PRAYER!!!!!

Then, I called my principal Thursday to tell him what was going on and that our plans to get Bella in June were not going to happen. I explained the various scenarios we were looking at and asked him about my options. If we get released this week, we would be looking at a mid to end of July pick up. I figured I would lay everything I wanted on the table and leave some room for negotiating. I told him I wanted to only go in the month of August to do my instruction, which at the kindergarten level is only 3 hours or so, and then let my aide take care of lunch, recess, nap time and centers. Then, I would come back full time after Labor Day. I explained how important it was for me to be the one taking care of Bella, instead of her being passed from caregiver to caregiver. Since she has been in the hogar from one day old and had numerous care givers, she needs to bond with me in the beginning. He understood and agreed. He said he had no problems with that plan. This would be perfect because I would get a few weeks with her at home (all day) and then my husband gets 4 weeks paternity leave and would be able to be home with her in the mornings while I am teaching. The best part is that, if this could happen, I would get my full salary and not have to worry about taking off without pay.

I TRULY believe the Lord is lining everything up because good news is coming this week! Please storm the gates of Heaven with us and believe God for good news.

"Father, I thank you for beginning to work out the details of Bella's homecoming. I ask for favor with the judge. I ask that our file would stand out to him on his desk and , although, he may not understand why, that he would have an urgency to release it. I thank you, in advance, for moving on his heart and getting our Bella out of there and home where she belongs. In Jesus' name I pray. Amen."

One way or another, with HIS help, I WILL "get it"

2007-06-16T03:19:00.000-04:00

You know how you have ups and downs during this process? Well, I do! I was struggling tonight-- I think because it was Friday-- no possible news for 2 days. I was reading one of my favorite blogs (dawnz-- A Life Outside the Box) and she had a quote from Oswald Chambers that really spoke to me.

"Faith is deliberate confidence in the character of God whose ways you may not understand at the time."

I am not understanding His ways at all. I truly don't get why I am missing a summer (I am a teacher) of not being able to be with my child. I was feeling sorry for myself and getting angry when I stumbled on this quote. Now, my mom tried to talk to me tonight and I did not want to hear it. I really appreciate her and should listen more often, but there are just times in this process that I don't want to hear it and tonight was one of them! I guess God wanted me to get this concept, because He put it in my face in a way that I did not have to "hear" it- I had to read it! :)

I am amazed at my God. One thing I am learning during this process, is that His grace is AMAZING!! No matter how many times I start to falter, or fuss, or cry , or complain, He always seems to send me something to remind me that He is in control and loves me enough to show me-- even when it takes MANY times of showing, in different ways!

I may not "get" the timing of Bella coming home, but I am starting to "get" that is not what He cares about-- my getting it. He cares about my trusting Him and I must say I still have a long way to go! He cares about the character He is building in me. (And at times, I must say, I doubt if it is any at all.) I do see growth and I am finding that the times I begin to struggle, it is because I am not staying in His Word, but looking to other means for encouragement, such as what the forums are saying, what agencies are saying and what attorneys are saying. I need to stay focused on what God's Word says (thanks Mom- I am listening) and that and that alone WILL get me through this excruciating waiting period.

So, I want to leave you with this amazing quote again:

"Faith is deliberate confidence in the character of God whose ways you may not understand at the time."

Check out dawnz blog. She has a really good post from Thursday.
http://prayingthemhome.blogspot.com/

Oh, thanks to all of you for responding to my call for adding you to my blog roll. I am going to work on that this weekend. And I will have a new look thanks to my friend Kristin (Kristin and Greg and Madalyn that will be on my blog roll). She made me this INCREDIBLE blog header and will be giving my blog a make-over. She did Natalie's this week and hers looks great! Kristin is very talented. I am thankful that God has brought her into my life! We have become fast friends and our husbands have somethings in common. (HE! HE!, Kristen) So, be checking-- things will change over sometime this week! Also, pray that her Madalyn and Natalie's Bella get released this week, along with my Bella. It is time for our girls to come home!!!!!

Have a great weekend! I plan to!

CALLING ALL LURKERS AND FAITHFUL COMMENTERS

2007-06-11T00:33:00.000-04:00

Calling all lurkers.... and my faithful commenters... I am adding a blog roll and would LOVE to add all of you. If you are okay with me listing your blog for others to read, please either e-mail me or post a comment with your blog address.

I also want to thank everyone for their support, encouragement and prayers over the past few days. It amazes me how many people out there care about us. And to think I have felt so alone... If you have been lurking (and I know some of you have), please leave me a comment so that I can return the support and prayers. And to my faithful commenters, please know that I read your blogs daily and each time I stop by, I pray for each of your families.

Friday night was a rough one. After we got our disappointing news, I broke down. You know how they say sometimes you have to hit rock bottom, before you can get out of the pit? Well, Friday night was my rock bottom. I found myself on the floor of my closet crying. Well, when I came out, something was different. I have more peace and hope than I have ever had in this entire process. I think God used this disappointment to break me and I am glad for it. (Who would have thought I would ever say that and mean it?!) I can definitely feel the prayers that are going up for us. I am excited to see what God has in store for the end of this journey. I know it is going to be BIG!!!!

I pray you all have a good week and may it bring the news we all hope to hear!

HELP!!!!

2007-06-08T23:27:00.001-04:00

We hit a MAJOR bump in our adoption today. I just got an e-mail from our agency coordinator and things are not looking good. This has been one roller coaster ride after another. I cannot post the details, but the news in the e-mail was disappointing-- we may not make a summer pick up and as you all know as a teacher, I I really needed that to happen. Also, Jeff goes this week to find out if he will need back surgery. He had it done last summer on the left side of his lower back and he may need it on the right side. Our finances are tapped out and daycare options are going to be limited since we are unsure of the timing of her coming home. Needless to say, I was very upset and disappointed!

I am asking everyone that feels led, to pray and fast with us this weekend. I heard a message on TV while we were at the beach this week and the preacher said this: "In order to get what you have never had, you must do what you have never done." Well, this weekend, I am getting into the Word of God and standing on His promises (thanks Mom) and storming Heaven's gates with a fervency I have never had before. We need extreme favor with a new judge and with our attorney. If you do not feel led to fast, please pray with us. If there was ever a time our family needed your prayers, it is now! Thank you in advance.

Don't Give Up! Keep Standing!

2007-06-07T22:36:00.000-04:00

A friend of mine just sent this to me. She came across it in her devotional today. Her name is Holly and she and her family are in the process of adopting their daughter from El Salvador. After you read this, go check out her blog. She always has great insight on things and has been used by God to speak to me. Thanks, Holly!

It’s based on 2 Kings 4:8 and it’s entitled “Don’t Give Up!”
The Bible speaks of a “great woman” who lived in Shunem. God gave her a son when she couldn’t have one. Then suddenly in his twenties he dies. So she picks him up, puts him on a horse and carries him back to Elisha, whom God has used to announce his birth in the first place. Imagine what her neighbors must have thought as she passed by. “It’s over, bury him!” But not her. She refused to stop and get the opinions of faithless people, or discuss her situation with those who were unqualified to help. Be careful who you open up to in a crisis! Make sure they know God and that their words line up with His. The warranty hasn’t expired on the promises God gave you. This woman believed that if God started it, He could finish it. If He made it, He could fix it.
And how does her story end? Elisha stretched his body out on top of the dead boy’s body and his corpse gets warm. Now that’s good, but this lad needs more than just warmth- he needs new life. So Elisha stretches out on top of him again. This time the boy sneezes 7 times and comes to life. What’s the lesson here for you? No matter how bad things look- stay on top of the situation! Keep believing in God! Walk the floor and pray all night if you have to, but don’t give up. Keep standing on the Word. Your dream may not be fully alive yet, but it’s getting warm. Things are improving. God is moving. Your answer is on the way- don’t give up until it arrives!

I will leave you with another verse she and her husband reminded me of:

Philippians 1:6 being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.

For all of us waiting for our babies and even for those of you that are waiting for something else to come about in your lives, this is a verse we should cling to daily. I still have no news, but I will take God at His word that He will do this for our family. Will you?

A Call to Prayer

2007-06-05T13:22:00.000-04:00

Okay, we are being told that our attorney is supposed to go see the judge to find out why our case has not been released with the other 8 that were originally submitted to him. Ours is just sitting there. I REALLY need your prayers today. Please pray that our attorney truly does this and that we would have favor with the judge. My summer time to bond with Bella is slipping away with each day that nothing happens. I am calling on each of you to pray and believe with us that Bella would be released this week . Our adoption coordinator says that there is NO reason that we have not been released, just that the judge has not done it yet. Today marks 9 weeks since we found out we had been kicked out of PGN on March 30. Before that we were in PGN Feb. 12 and kicked out at the end of Feb. for no PA. We went back to PGN March 8. We were told going to FC for a ruling would only take 1-2 weeks. NOT!!!!!! I watched all of the other cases that were submitted to the judge get out between Monday and Wednesday last week and then when mine was set to come, he just stopped! You can imagine the torment we are experiencing right now.

Please pray with us and storm Heaven's gates this week for Bella to be released! We thank you in advance for your prayers!

Hope...again

2007-06-02T17:16:00.000-04:00

To those of you that are wondering where my post from yesterday is, I had a really hard day yesterday and I deleted it. I had typed a piece about hope and after I posted, I went downhill. I did not want to post something that I could not believe at the time. I have spent time in prayer and reading my Bible and God renewed me. I feel like the fire has been turned up and the refiner is watching to see what I am made of. Yesterday, I waivered and today, I can say, my hope is renewed.

I still have no idea when the judge will release my case. I keep asking "why" are all the others out and not mine. I have believed and prayed just as hard. The only thing I can "hear" is that He is interested in me and how I will choose to handle the situation. Like it or not-- it is this way. I am going to stay in His word this week and whatever He has in store, I will accept. I hope to get good news, but there is no guarantee. I will place my hope in Him.

We went to visit my father-in-law in the hospital last night and they had a scripture on the door of the room next to him. It was about God being my strength. I had just told Jeff how tired I was of all of this and I did not know what to do. Well... there was my answer. God is my refuge and strength and His joy will get me through this difficult time. Please continue to pray for Bella to be released, but most of all, pray for me to keep my focus where it needs to be-- ON HIM!

Happy 10th Anniversary!!!!!

2007-05-31T13:37:00.000-04:00

I love this man! He truly is my best friend, lover, supporter, and soul mate.

"I LOVE you more than words can express and am so happy that God chose for us to ride this ride of life together. It has been quite an adventure, thus far, and I cannot wait to see what is in store for us in the coming years. You definitely complete me!"

Happy Birthday to my Man!

2007-05-30T23:06:00.000-04:00

I want to dedicate this post to my wonderful husband. It is his birthday today and he turned the BIG 40!! He is such a good husband and daddy. Tomorrow is our 10th anniversary and I can think of no better present than to get word that the FC judge has approved our case. Lots of others that were submitted with ours have gotten out this week. The judge has released 1-3 each day this week. I am praying that God is going to make tomorrow REALLY special for our family. Please pray this with us.

Now, back to Jeff. He has so many wonderful qualities! He is kind, generous, funny, smart, witty, and I think incredibly good looking! ;) He has been so supportive during the past 7 years. He has put up with my many mood changes during our battle with infertility and dealt with my crying fits during this adoption. He has listened to my many questions about "why" and "how" and eased my fears every time I let them try to overcome me. I honestly don't know how he lived with me on some days. But he did it and he loved me at my most unlovable times.

"Thank you, Baby! I love you more than words can express. You are the BEST! Happy Birthday!"

So thankful...

2007-05-25T15:54:00.000-04:00

Last week I went to the dermatologist to have a mole checked out. It had turned black and my husband was a little concerned. The doctor did an in-office biopsy. The nurse called yesterday with the results. There are 3 ways that a mole biopsy can come out. 1. it is benign 2. it is in the gray area (with atypical cells) 3. it is malignant. Well, my report came back at #2-- in the gray area. That means that under the microscope there were some cells my doctor does not like and wants ALL gone. They are going to remove a 2-3 inch section that is the shape of a football in the area of the mole. I asked if this was pre-cancerous and she said "NO"-- he just wants it ALL gone. So, in 2 weeks I will go to his office and have this "simple" procedure done. The area will be numb and she assured me I would not feel any of it. I have my doubts about that!:) Of course, I googled when I got home and read that eventually these atypical cells could turn into cancer. I am SOOOO thankful that did not happen! Praise God!!

Now, let me tell you about the rest of my week. I am not at liberty to report all the details of where my case is right now. Once Bella is home, I will post the particulars and you will see the miracle of it all. I can tell you that I did receive information Wednesday night that had me in the dumps! Jake went to church with a friend of mine that night and when we went to pick him up, my friend came to the car to share something with me. Her pastor had preached a message on the blind man that was brought to Jesus. He was asked "who sinned-- him or his parents? Why has this happened to him?'' Well, let me digress to let you know that has been my NUMBER 1 question these days. The reply from Jesus spoke VOLUMES to me. He told them that the matter at hand was not whether he sinned or his parents, but that this had come about that the Father may be glorified. WOW! Suddenly, I GOT it. It is not about the why, but about what He is doing in me through the situation and the "how" He is going to get the glory. I decided right then and there that I wanted to bring Him glory no matter how bleak this process gets for us. My husband and daddy have said all along that this adoption was not just about getting our baby, but that He had a much bigger plan in it all. I have repented for my lack of trust and attitude these past months and decided that I am going to do my best to go forward and bring Him glory! After all, where we are now in the process, the only way she is coming home is because HE does it. To God be the glory!

I was also reminded this week that all throughout the Bible, God turned the hearts of kings and rulers and all in authority towards the people of God. I know that during this time, I allowed the enemy to come in and rob me of what I know to be true about my God. He is powerful and more than able to accomplish all I need done. I got so caught up in Sr. Barrios, my attorney, FC judges and what they would not do, that I forgot that I have an intimate relationship with the Creator of this universe- my Heavenly Father and my Savior-- and changing the hearts of evil men is what He did best in the Old Testament. The past couple of days, I have been reading my Bible more and praying for their hearts to be turned toward my adoption and thanking God for it-- instead of asking "Why?". I am not accepting that this is just the way things go in international adoption. I found a verse on my last visit trip and cannot find it again. I do remember that it said something about "I will bring your daughters out of captivity." Well, right now, our children are in captivity because evil men like Mr. PGN and some reviewers are holding them there with legalities. I declare today that "in the name of Jesus, they are coming out sooner, rather that later!"

I am praying for each of you daily and look forward to good things beginning to happen in the coming days. Hang in there-- they ARE coming home. Anne Pearce is just the beginning! (Congrats Lou and family-- you give us all hope and remind us that God is faithful- He does finish what He starts!)

I love you all and am appreciative for the encouragement and prayers. Keep them coming!

Happy 8 months old, my Bellaboo!

2007-05-20T23:46:00.000-04:00

Bella,

You are getting to be such a big baby girl-- already 8 months old. We thought for sure you would be home with us, but it has not worked out that way. Our Heavenly Father chose for you to be a part of our family and He knows the EXACT day you are to arrive. We have missed many firsts along the way, but He gave us two of the most important ones. Daddy and I got to be there when you turned one month old and were so sick. I was there to take care of you during your first fever and you and I bonded at a very specific moment on that trip. God allowed our eyes to meet and in that early morning moment,He let us both know that our hearts were FOREVER linked. I am so thankful for that first! We know that He is preparing our home for you and your heart for us. Not a day or moment goes by that Mommy and Daddy don't think about you and pray for you. You are a very loved baby girl! Lots of people are eagerly awaiting your arrival. We are praying that you will not celebrate many more "birthdays" without us. Hang in there, Bella, Mommy, Daddy and your big brother, Jake, will be there soon. Your room is finished and I know you are going to LOVE it-- it is very girly! :) You are an answer to MANY years of prayer. What God begins, He always finishes. Your homecoming will be a testimony to His faithfulness in the lives of His children. See you soon!!

Love,

Mommy

The Seed

2007-05-09T22:37:00.000-04:00

I have spoken to many of you this week and you all know that I have been struggling. I mean REALLY struggling. In fact, I don't think that I have been this negative and broken throughout this entire process. I have made many giant strides in the past couple of months, but with the strides I make, I end up further back because I continue to keep my eye on the circumstances surrounding me. Now let me tell you that the circumstances surrounding me do not look good! Let me begin by laying a little foundation.

I spoke to my friend today and told her "I can't go on like this. I cannot do this anymore. Why is this happening? Why can't I seem to catch a break? This isn't fair." Now, all of this has some truth to it. But there is bigger truth I need to see and understand. This is where my husband comes in.

I broke down tonight and told my husband that I was really scared that she will not be home in time for me to go pick her up before I start school in the fall. He responded with this analogy that is so simple and that I have heard my entire Christian walk. But for some reason, it took on a whole new meaning for me this time. Faith begins as a small seed (the Bible says a mustard seed) and like any seed, in order for it to grow bigger and produce something, it must begin to take root. Everytime I get that boost of faith from God in the form of a verse of scripture to stand on, a dream that He speaks to me in, a love note from Him, etc., I hold onto it and get so excited. I put my burden at His feet and go on my way. But within 12 -24 hours, when my circumstances have not changed, I pick it up, inspect it and then rip it out to wallow in it. I am not giving it the time and attention it needs to root and grow. This is and always has been a BIG fault of mine. He told me that,lately, he never knows where I "stand" because he can't "find"me-- I am usually flying off the handle somewhere listening to the lies of the enemy.

Well, tonight, we have decided that TOGETHER we are going to declare that we are planting ourselves on the promise of God that states that He WILL finish that which He has started. There is NO doubt in my mind that He started this adoption!!! Therefore, He HAS to complete it. The key word here is not complete. It is HE. That's right. HE, not I, not my attorney-- but HE will finish it according to HIS plan and my part is to be okay with it. That is where my struggle is. It's in being okay with WHATEVER He sees fit for my life. I am going to get there- with His help. So, if any of you want to know where I am in this process, I am standing here and not budging until my God brings me through to the other side!

My mom has tried over and over to tell me this and I fail to listen. Believe it or not, Mom, I have been listening and God has used you to soften my heart. I may not admit it to you then, but you have been a help to me. I hang up the phone and ponder your words (even when I don't want to). I am so blessed to have my family and friends that support and encourage me even when I can be so obstinate. Thank you!

So, once again, I have had another breakthrough. I am hoping these many breakthroughs will lead me to becoming the woman of faith that my Father desires me to be. I started not to post this, but realized that was being prideful. I had fear I would look like a flake to everyone that reads my blog. But tonight, I hope you don't see me that way, but instead see a mother that is struggling with her fears and flesh and trying to emerge victorious one day!

Now, pardon me while I stand here and wait for my God to show Himself MIGHTY!!